Not Any Other Way
by EnjoyyourJacob
Summary: If you had the chance to start your life over from the beginning, knowing what was coming at you, would you do it all over? Would you make the same choices again?  Four-shot
1. Part I  As Easy as Breathing?

**Short Summary:** If you had the chance to start your life over from the beginning, knowing what was coming at you, would you do it all over? Would you make the same choices again?

_**One-shot in three parts.**_

**Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. If it belonged to me, the story would have gone different and Jacob end up with Bella. **

**I pay my respects to the Quileute Tribe and their Gods. We only know fragments of their history and traditions; strictly speaking I know only what I could pull from the Internet. So everything Quileute related I used for my story may or may not be correct in any way. **

**Short Summary:**If you had the chance to start your life over from the beginning, knowing what was coming at you, would you do it all over? Would you make the same choices again?

**Pairing: Jacob/Bella**  
><strong>Universe: Post Eclipse<strong>  
><strong>Genre: RomanceDrama**

**Rating: M **

**First Beta: Jake's Girl**  
><strong>Second Beta: Jakejunkie<strong>

**A/N: I need to say a few words before you can go on reading.**

**.**

**I wanna thank you, Lori, my first beta. You begged me to take you as my beta and it was a good thing! After reading the original one-shot, you pushed me to extend what I had planned so far, and together we came up with a lot of stuff we realized we BOTH had experienced in our life. Thanks to you, people will get to read a three-part one-shot instead of the small thingy I had planned. I'm really looking forward on working on Part II and III with you! HUGS!**

**.**

**And my poor second beta - Jakejunkie ... When I first informed you about the new one-shot I'm coming up with, I told you it wouldn't be longer than about 3000 words. LOL And then, unexpectedly LOL, I informed you that I was going to split said one-shot in three parts and Part I has 6000 words already. I'm glad you didn't flip me the bird, honey. Thank you for editing. :-) Will you be my beta for Part II and III as well? **

.

.

_**Not Any Other Way**_

**.**

_**Note to self**_:

Live with love in your heart and

Don't back down .

Do what you want to do,

Be who you want to be.

Regrets don't exist if you live your life

As a heartfelt expression.

Take one day at time,

Be ready for anything that comes your way.

When you stay connected to truth

You can do no harm.

Don't allow your heart to hurt

Waiting on others to love you.

No one will ever love you the way

You are supposed love yourself.

Compassion is king.

Forgiveness is healing.

Love is what lights up this world of darkness.

Don't be scared to burn brightly.

_It's what you were born to do_.

The world will not have it any other way.

.

_**Part One**_

_**As Easy as Breathing? **_

_**.**_

Jacob was hurting, but he smiled. The vampire, who had smashed his body, unintentionally had given him a future. How so? Scared that she might lose him, Bella had finally made up her mind.

Cullen, listening to the pack mind throughout the entire battle, knew what had happened and brought her to the clearing. She totally lost it, seeing Jacob severely injured and barely conscious. The pack had to carry him home. She walked right with them, fearing for Jacobs's life every inch of the way.

While Dr. Fang was treating his injuries she sat by his side, refusing to go anywhere. She cradled his head in her lap, talking him through the terrible pain of getting his bones re-broken. At some point, he couldn't stop bellowing out his pain anymore. Her tears wet his face, but she stayed where she was, trying to soothe him, and he couldn't be more grateful.

Much later, when the leech doc had left and she thought he had fallen asleep, she brushed a stray strand of ebony hair from his face and quietly walked out of his room. He was afraid that she would leave and go back to her fiancée. His heart cramped painfully inside his chest at the thought, making it hard for him to breathe. It wasn't long until she returned, and he saw she had been crying. She slipped in next to him, careful not to jostle him, kissing him softly on his cheek. "It's you, Jacob. I chose you."

She had broken off the engagement. For him. Now, she was sleeping next to him.

Jacob was hurting, but he smiled, touching her hand softly. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Bella was crying a lot. She didn't regret breaking up with Edward, but she hated the consequence—the Cullens leaving town. Jacob would dry her tears, hold and soothe her, although he couldn't quite comprehend how she could think about _her_leeches as family.

She wasn't as bad as she had been before when they had left the first time, but Jacob wished she would come around a little bit faster. School was out. It was summer, and they were supposed to hang out and have fun instead of moping around in his garage.

Jacob tried to be patient. As long as Bella would stick to her decision, he wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob was failing Calculus, English Lit, and Biology. During these first few weeks of his senior year, he had missed too much school since Sam wouldn't let up on their usual patrolling routine. They could never be sure that the area was really clean of vampires, he argued. After all, it was still possible the Volturi would return, looking for Bella.

His mind was distracted. He could barely keep up. He was in love with Bella, and she was in love with him. They had started exploring a physical relationship over the summer and found, they couldn't get enough of each other.

His teachers said it would be a close call and that he needed to study hard or he would flunk. Jacob was pissed at himself. He wanted to give Bella a future and be able to take care of her financially. He promised to do better in school, even if it meant that he had to shorten his time with Bella.

Bella was worth it. Jacob wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Charlie caught them making out in Bella's truck.

His face was sooo red. Jacob couldn't tell if it was from anger or the embarrassment of catching them in an intimate position, but he feared Charlie would drop dead on the spot. Charlie dragged Jacob out of the truck by his ear and into the house, causing him to stumble up the front stairs in an effort to keep his ear attached to his head!

A_ really _awkward sex talk followed along with some _new_ground rules.

Charlie gave the two teenagers in front of him the evil eye, and declared that from now on he would monitor them more closely. Bella stood up for herself and for Jacob, stating that she was eighteen and old enough to have a physical relationship her boyfriend. Charlie softened, a bit, when Bella threatened to move out, but stated he didn't want to see them making out ever again and he definitely didn't want to hear them, either. One of Charlie's ground rules said that Jacob had to  
>leave the Swan's house by 11 pm.<p>

Under Charlie's new reign of wrath, it didn't take him long to discover Jacob had been sneaking into his daughter's window at night.

All hell broke loose.

Jacob thought he would prefer fighting a bloodsucker to the wrath of Charlie Swan. But, Bella had chosen him and that alone made it all worth it.

Jacob wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

They had sex for the first time on one of those weekends when Charlie and Billy were fishing.

It was awkward to say the least. Although they had been making out a lot already, they were nervous, and then it wouldn't fit.

_[…Deleted scene due to graphic content. Find entire one-shot on Jacob Black N Pack…]_

They both agreed happily they could practice as often as they wanted.

Jacob DEFINITELY wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob knew that Bella didn't like celebrating her birthday. That's why he approached the topic carefully. To his surprise Bella agreed to a bonfire at First Beach without any complaint. Okay, she didn't see the point of embracing the_ beauty _of her 19th birthday (Jake's words), but if throwing her a party meant so much to him, she wouldn't stand in his way. Since they had bonfires all the time, it didn't make her feel uncomfortable or special in any way. Apart from that, celebrating your birthday with people who actually did age was okay. She rolled her eyes at him when he mentioned, technically, he wouldn't age as long as he was phasing. Bella explained that organizing the party would make him at least 28. Jacob agreed.

Her birthday party was fun. The entire wolf pack was there. Bella had invited Angela and Jessica, too. Bella didn't need to get stitched up this time, but she stumbled and twisted her ankle. Jacob kissed it better and then snuck away with Bella, celebrating her birthday in a very special way. He did last more than 10 minutes this time, and he was proud with himself. Bella added two more years to his age, for making her cum before him.

Jacob couldn't stop grinning for the rest of the evening. Life was good.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Bella started college. She enrolled at UW Tacoma. It was close enough to La Push to go home every other weekend. She shared an apartment with Kim and Jared, who started college, too. Seeing Kim  
>and Jared together <em>(and hearing them, ugh...)<em>made her miss Jacob terribly, but at least she wasn't alone.

Before long, Bella began feeling strange. She was always tired, probably because of getting used to college and new people. She had mood swings and littlest things made her cry, probably because she missed Jacob so much. Sometimes, she had to throw up or she felt nauseated all day. That probably was because she didn't cook at the campus as much as she wanted to, but with being so tired all the time, sandwiches and take-away were the easier options.

Then she fainted in her business class. Bella knew of no reason for fainting, but she had thoroughly scared the crap out of Jared. The nurse, in fact, only asked two questions and the _true_ reason for Bella's _illness_was clear.

Jacob had gotten her pregnant. _Awkward sex talk with her father and all, they hadn't been careful enough, simply got carried away at the beach one day_.

When the initial shock wore off, Jacob was brimming over with joy. But he was worried, too.  
>Would he be able to take care of a family of his own, already?<p>

Were they really ready to be *_gulp* _parents?

Bella trusted him. She told him they would make it. After all, they loved each other and she already loved the tiny baby growing inside her. His baby. _Their baby._She even told him she hoped that it would look like him. Jacob was all smiles after that.

Even when having a baby at such a young age would be a challenge, Bella had chosen a human life, and Jacob wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Charlie went ballistic when they told him. He banned Jacob from his property and proceeded to get into a huge fight with Bella. Charlie—worrying for his daughter's future—wouldn't give in.  
>He wanted her to wait. She yelled back at him. The baby was already growing in her belly!<p>

Thinking that Charlie wanted her to get rid of the baby shocked the hell out of her. She refused to cook for him. She refused to speak to him. She finally threatened to move out, and Charlie caved, realizing that Bella did indeed mean it. She wanted the baby more than anything in the world.

Charlie demanded Jacob and Billy come over, asking them about Jacob's plans for the future. They laid down everything in minute detail: Jacob would take a high school equivalency test, begin with computer classes for a college degree, and get a job at the local car shop. In a year or two Billy would take out a business loan and set Jacob up with his own shop as a mechanic.

Charlie still was upset with Jake for getting his "little girl" knocked up, but he finally saw how much Jacob cared and that he actually was responsible, too. They shook hands and Jacob sighed with relief.

It had been straining five days, but Bella loved him and would give him a baby soon.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob turned 17 in January.

Bella took a few days off from college and came home to celebrate his birthday. She needed to get some days off as the pregnancy wasn't easy on her. She was still throwing up and always so tired, but she really wanted to have that evening with Jacob.

He took her on a date to a steak house in Port Angeles. Dinner was fine, but on the ride home Bella got sick and threw up in his car. They spent the rest of the night cleaning themselves and his car.

Bella was upset with herself for ruining his birthday, but Jacob wrapped a thick blanket around her, took her in his arms and carried her to the beach.

He sat her down at their driftwood tree and proposed to her. She said yes, still having the stink of vomit in her nose and all, and her laughter resonated all over the beach. They stayed huddled together for a long time, searching for the brightest star in the sky, which they would give to their baby.

Jacob was happy. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob and Bella got married February 14th.

Since Jacob was only 17, they needed Billy to go with them to the county clerk's office for the license. Billy had to give his consent for Jacob to get the license and with the license Old Quil, the Tribal Council leader, was allowed to do their wedding ceremony.

It was raining that day and Bella had to wear warm boots and pants under her simple white dress. Her belly was huge already, and she was glowing with happiness. Jacob loved seeing her like this. Right before Old Quil started the wedding ceremony Jacob whispered into Bella's ear that looking at her would make him all horny yet again. He smirked at her, and she smacked him upside the head with her bouquet. Their guests laughed. Someone shouted that Jacob had truly found his match. Bella blushed and Jacob couldn't stop grinning throughout the entire ceremony.

After the ceremony they drove to the La Push Resort, where the reception was held. They got drenched in the rain on their short way from the car to the entrance area. Bella's hair was dripping wet and fell out of her up-do. In fact, both looked like drowned rats in their wet clothes. She, nevertheless, was the most beautiful bride anyone had ever seen. Jacob swept her up and whirled her around, making her squeal in delight.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

They moved in with Billy.

He relied on Jacob's help anyway and it was the only logical decision, given that money was _very _tight. The pack gave them a helping hand, renovating the house and adding another-bigger-room for Bella and Jake to live in. Bella made it her task to decorate the house and give it a female touch.

Jacob wished they had more time completely alone. Sometimes, it bothered him that they had to be quiet when having sex, but then he thought they should be happy that they were able to live together at all.

Okay, it wasn't exactly how he imagined living with Bella would be, but he wouldn't have it any other way,_ for now._

_._

oOo

.

Their son was born in May. They named him Jeremy.

A couple of days after the birth, Bella received a phone call from Alice Cullen, congratulating them. She asked if she was allowed to visit Bella and the baby. Jacob agreed, but only after Bella had been pleading with him for hours. He didn't feel comfortable having a vampire in the same house with a woman who had recently given birth—Bella was still bleeding—and a fragile, helpless newborn.  
>Bella convinced him that it was okay and that Alice wouldn't hurt her or the baby.<p>

Jacob tried, but as soon as he had opened the door and asked the pixie in, his instincts got the better of him. He had tried, he tried _really_hard. He didn't mean to growl and snarl at Alice Cullen nor did he want to phase in the middle of the living room, shattering the furniture. The bloodsucker left (she fled to be honest), apologizing. She would come back later, when he would be more stable.

Bella was livid, had demanded he sleep elsewhere. She didn't want him close to the baby when he couldn't control his phasing. When night came, he settled on the floor in the living room, the area closest to their bedroom. "Jake, come here," her sweet voice sounded, inviting him back into their bed.

The day had been interesting to say the least, he had his first real big fight with Bella, but she had forgiven him in the end. He snuggled in gently against Bella, not wanting to jostle his sleeping son, and wrapped his arms securely around them.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob graduated in June and that fall he started with his online courses while he still worked full time at the Forks car shop. Their first year went by smoothly. Jeremy was such a good baby that slept a lot and kept himself entertained. Bella seemed to smile all the time.

Being a mother suited Bella well. She had blossomed into a beautiful young woman. She wasn't the skinny, insecure girl anymore.

Jacob loved the new Bella. He really admired her new curves and was in awe of the easiness with which she handled Jeremy, the household chores, and took care of Billy.

Before Jeremy's first birthday she had convinced him to have another baby - "_soonish"_.

He didn't mind making babies with Bella. Not at all.

She got pregnant again right away and filled out even more. Jacob loved coming home from his job to find Bella cooking dinner in the kitchen, balancing little Jeremy on her hip, maneuvering her protruding belly around the pans and pots, and talk animatedly to Billy.

Jacob would close the door behind him, rip his dirty shirt off and kick his uncomfortable shoes from his feet. Then he would enter the kitchen, greeting his father with a slap on his back on his way to Bella. He would kiss her, kiss Jerry, and kiss the new baby through her belly.

_AHH_ - Life was good. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

It was Friday, January 13th, when Sue placed Jayden, son number two, into Jacob's protective arms.

Bella had gone into labor so fast they didn't make it to Forks hospital. In fact, they didn't even make it to the car.

A frantic Billy called over to Sue's, she was a nurse after all, while Jacob tried his very best to be of help to Bella, who was kneeling over the side of the bath tub, panting - the baby already pushing its way out.

Little Jeremy slept soundly through all the uproar, and Sue got there just in time to help "catch" the new baby, witness his first cry, and coach Jacob on cutting the umbilical cord.

When Bella was cleaned up and settled in their marriage bed, Billy wheeled himself into the bedroom. "Hell, if the kid doesn't exactly look like you, Jake!" he said stunned as he laid eyes on his grandson for the first time.

Jake beamed proudly as he gazed down at his beautiful son. He and Bells certainly had a knack for making beautiful babies. The intense feeling of love and protectiveness over his growing family threatened to overwhelm him and he felt a little choked up as he lowered himself to the edge of bed so carefully, holding Jayden as if he was the most breakable thing on earth.

"Happy Birthday, Daddy," Bella cooed, glancing at the clock.

_"NO WAY!" _Jacob shook his head in surprise and disbelief. It was way after midnight. That would mean... Today was his 19th birthday! "Best birthday present ever..." He smiled as Bella settled back against the pillows and reached out for the baby. Jake placed Jay into her arms and snuggled in around them as she put him to her breast. Jacob watched in awe as she slipped her beautiful pink nipple into his son's eager mouth.

He didn't think he could be any happier than he was right now. Who would have thought that the love he felt for Bella - the love he had always felt for her - could intensify even more. He thought that his heart was going to burst from all the emotions going on in him.

"You did this, Bells! I'm so proud of you. I love you so much," Jacob rasped, teary-eyed, softly stroking his son's downy head.

He didn't care that he was crying tears of joy in front of his father. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Right after Jayden was born Bella was determined to resume pursuing her degree. Fortunately, most of her classes were offered online. It was a huge challenge finding the time since Jayden was a very demanding baby who cried a lot. Some days, she didn't know where her head was anymore. Breastfeeding, changing diapers, soothing Jayden, and taking care of Jeremy absolutely wore her out. Truth to be told, Jeremy actually still was a baby, too, and he needed her just as much as Jayden.  
>She never imagined that having two kids could be so difficult.<p>

The biggest challenge, however, became keeping Jayden safe from the love of his brother.

When they laid Jayden on his blanket, Jeremy would be right there almost on top of him. His hugs were too much for tiny Jayden. They put Jayden in the baby seat on the table. Bella got in the room just in time to see Jeremy pull Jayden's seat all the way to the edge of the table. "Hold Jay! Hold Jay!" he chirped at his momma. They put Jayden IN his infant seat IN the playpen for maximum safety, only to have Jeremy climb the side to get in, accidentally kicking Jayden on the head.

They were at a loss.

One day, Sue brought Bella a long piece of fabric. She called it a _wrap_ and showed Bella how to use it to put baby Jayden on her back. So, for a while, carrying Jayden in the wrap was the solution. It put the baby out of the danger zone, and with the baby on her back, Bella had her hands free for Jeremy and her household chores.

Studying, however, meant sitting still for longer amounts of time and little Jayden hated it when mommy didn't move and walk around. He would cry and fuss until Bella started to bounce and jiggle to keep him happy. Thank God, they didn't have to do long car rides like Sam and Emily, she thought when all the walking and jiggling started to get on her nerves.

Finally, Sue, Charlie, and Billy agreed to come by and help out with the kids so Bella could work on her classes. Bella and Jacob had discussed daycare, but Jacob had insisted daycare was out of the question for them. They would want to care for their children, not some group of strangers.

Between taking his online courses, working and his patrols, Jacob was a very busy man these days, too! When he did get home there were diapers to change, kids to feed, errands to run, chores to complete, stories to read, games to play, and baths to give, but he would be damned if he would fall short on his pledge of taking care of her and his kids.

He caught himself sigh longingly as he sprawled across their bed in exhaustion. Bella's eyes were shut as she rested among the pillows with his son sleeping at her bare breasts. _Sometimes, _he missed just the two of them, but the kids were their life now, and they couldn't be happier.

He knew in his heart they would make it. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Alice came to visit again. Bella made her wait until she wasn't bleeding anymore, knowing that it would make it easier for Jacob to hold in his protective instincts.

Jacob did a lot better this time, and Alice was careful to avoid anything that might call out the wolf in him. The sad, longing look in her eyes when she watched the sleeping baby and the playing toddler convinced Jacob that she would never do any harm to their kids or Bella. He asked Alice if she wanted to hold the baby for a while.

Jacob was sorry for Alice. She would never get the chance to have a baby. He gazed at Bella and their eyes met in understanding. She had almost blown this chance at a normal, human life. Just a couple of years ago she was so determined to become a vampire just like _them_.

_I love you. I'm happy,_Bella mouthed. She didn't regret anything. She had a wonderful husband and two beautiful kids. A human life was the right decision to make.

She wouldn't have it any other way and neither would Jacob.

.

oOo

.

Jacob awoke with a start. Tiny feet kicked his stomach. The bed moved as Jeremy began jumping up and down on the mattress. Then, the toddler plopped down on Jacob's chest and his chubby hands moved across his daddy's face, trying to pry open his eyes. "Wakey?" a thin voice asked.

"Sssh, don't wake the baby," Jacob answered gruffly, burying his head face-first in his pillow and putting his arm around Jeremy to keep him from jumping. Jeremy screamed protesting, and Jayden followed. Great! Now the baby was awake, too.

"Lemme sleep." Jacob pulled the pillow over his head. He just couldn't get up yet. He really needed to sleep.

He heard Bella rise, taking the baby and the toddler with her. He sighed in relief and fell back asleep at once not aware that she was watching him. Although she was so damned tired, she would never tire looking at her handsome husband. He was her strength. Her sun.

She had been breastfeeding a teething Jayden the entire night, but who needed sleep when you were a parent, huh? Sleep was totally overrated anyway. Bella yawned and closed the bed room door behind her. It was time to change diapers, to breastfeed the baby some more, and to get Jeremy fed. She could always sneak in a nap with the boys later, but Jake wouldn't have that luxury.

Bella rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. She was tired, but she wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

When Jacob was 21, Sam stepped down as the Alpha and Jacob took over. Not only did he become the Alpha of his pack, he also became the new Chief of the Quileute Tribe as it was tradition. He was ready to take on the responsibility.

His taking over as the Alpha wasn't celebrated in any way. Sam and Jacob just informed the pack about the change. Nobody questioned it, and it was settled.

His becoming the new Chief, however, was celebrated. Festivities went on for three days, where everyone was wearing the traditional Tribal costumes – the black and red pants, vests and tunics. Jacob insisted Bella had to wear his mother's dress, which Bella agreed to. Their two sons got dressed in a black and red robe as well.

Before the festivities started, Jacob went on a spiritual quest to A-Ka-Lat, James Island, the holy place of their ancestors. For three days he stayed there, asking the spirits and his ancestors for guidance, strength, and wisdom, just like last Chiefs before him had done.

Immediately after Jacob returned from his spiritual quest, Bella noticed a dignity in Jacob she only had ever seen in Billy before. Jacob appeared majestically wise and profoundly commanding in every stance. When he went through the initial ceremony and Billy declared him the new Chief, she stared at Jacob in his costume and with his black and red face painting. She was stunned, overwhelmed, and at a loss of words. How in the world did she deserve this man?

Jacob still had his father by his side the first years, but soon Jacob realized that he was fully capable to do the job and do it right.

Bella was proud of him and supported him as much as she could, but she wished he would find more time for her and the kids. Sometimes, the strains of the day caused them to argue, but she knew he did this all for them. Their fights were short-lived, fortunately, but a little more Jake n Bells time would be_ really _nice.

When another day was over and they fell asleep in their huge (Jake-made) bed with their kids snoring peacefully next to them, they knew they wouldn't have it any other way.

.

o0o

.

They went out clubbing for the first time.

It was hard to say who wanted date night most - the grandparents or Jacob and Bella.

Sue and Charlie - now legally married - practically forced them to go out, saying they were young and should enjoy some alone time. They really had earned it with all the energy they put into their kids, studying and working...

Bella was worried about leaving the kids "alone" with the grandparents, but Jacob reassured her,_ repeatedly_, that Jeremy loved to be with his grandparents and Jayden was old enough to be without her for a while. He pointed out that with what had been going on since the kids were born, they really needed one night to just be about them - Jake and Bells.

To make it easier for Bella, they stayed in Forks the first time they went out. They ate at the diner and then visited the only dance club in Forks. Bella, who always thought dancing was awkward, found herself being pulled into Jake's arms and swayed around with ease. She actually enjoyed dancing with him. He was a natural. The way he moved his hips, soon made Bella feel all hot and bothered inside, but then she saw other women staring at _her Jake_as if he was something delicious to eat. She became very jealous and made sure to claim her property. She was all over Jake for the rest of the evening and when the night came to a close, she practically ravished him in a back alley on their way back to their car.

Jacob, who thought he would need a little alcohol and a lot of seduction to get his Bells back, was pleasantly surprised at her aggressiveness and didn't mind being ravished at all.

Jacob was so happy to finally have some free time with his Bells, apart from taking care of his family, working his ass off and patrolling. His happiness - once again - rubbed off on Bella, and the stress between them lifted, the fights became less. Soon, they were looking forward to their regular date nights as much as the grandparents did.

Jacob knew he was gonna get to make love to Bella on date nights. He was happy, Bells was happy  
>and the grandparents were happy.<p>

Jacob wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob groaned tiredly. It was still dark outside and he wanted a lot more sleep. He had been working long hours at the shop and doing nightly patrols on top of everything else. But, their sons, very obviously, didn't spend much time on sleeping. They were fighting. Again. At six in the morning. On a freakin' Sunday!

"Will you two shut up?" Jake yelled, but the fighting just kept on. Undaunted. He might as well have been yelling into his pillow.

Bella's head jerked up. She sighed and rubbed her back and belly. Her night hadn't been any better. Nasty back aches, and numerous trips to the potty kept her awake.

Jacob groaned again and sat up in all his naked glory. "Catch some more sleep, honey," he murmured, kissing Bella on top of her head. She needed to rest more the doctor had said. The baby inside of her demanded all of her strength.

"Let _me _take care of them." He glared at the door, behind which his sons still were fighting like rabid dogs and slipped into a pair of shorts. With her eyes cracked open a tiny slit, Bella took in his excellent physique, marveled over his broad back and lean, strong muscles and moaned. "Will you come back soon?" she asked him and her hand slipped between her legs on its own.

"Oh, fuck." His eyes flitted back and forth between his wife and the door. He wanted to be where her hand was right now. "Right back," he growled, tugging at his hair in frustration. He then huffed and puffed, making himself look as big and as scary as he could manage. With a determined look on his face he pounced through the door, making Jeremy and Jayden scream in surprise.

"I'll show you," he thundered at his kids and picked them up by their legs, letting them dangle upside down. "You be quiet now!" He ordered setting them on the couch in front of the TV and turned the volume on loud. His sons wailed that they were hungry. Jacob stalked into the kitchen, pulling a cereal box from the shelf. He tossed it onto the couch. His kids protested louder. "It's Sunday. We want a real breakfast."

Jacob clenched his teeth. "You be good boys. If you let me sleep for another hour, I'll make you a huge breakfast later." His sons pouted, but agreed. They knew better than to argue with their dad when he looked that grumpy.

"Good." Jacob turned around, smiling smugly. Mission accomplished. The kids would be quiet now. That he was sure. He went back to Bella, locking the door behind him.

Like promised, he came back an hour later "well rested" and fixed them all a huge breakfast.

He might be tired and worn out, but he had his Bells, his two sons and a new kid on the way. He didn't mind only having two hours of sleep.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

"Aunt" Alice came for her one of her infamous visits, toting a car full of clothes and toys for the kids.  
>It had been almost two years since Joey was born, and she couldn't wait to see them all again.<p>

But instead of the usual bear hug from Jayden, he tried to bite her and insisted Alice may not touch his baby brother. He even growled at her, and demanded to know why she smelled so strange?

Jacob and Bella exchanged knowing glances before Jacob took Joey on his arm and herded Jayden out of the house. "Let's go play some ball. Let the ladies talk," Jacob insisted, nodding for Jeremy to join them.

Bella sadly asked Alice to leave and to not come back. She didn't want Alice's close proximity to affect the kids - after all, they seemed to carry their father's wolf gene. She would miss Alice, but it was for the sake of her kids, who should grow up like 'normal' kids. Besides, what were telephones and internet there for? They could still stay in contact, alright? Alice nodded and left.

Bella was sad, but when she looked out the windows watching her kids play, she knew it was the right decision to make.

She wouldn't have it any other way.

.

_Part II coming up soon..._

Reviews are wanted. They make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :-)


	2. Part II The Natural Path

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. What a pity.**

**Thanks to my wonderful betas: Jake's Girl and Jakejunkie! It's so much fun working with you.**

**Not Any Other Way**

.

_Part II_

_**~~ The Natural Path ~~**_

.

When Jacob turned 25, the bank finally approved a business loan for Jacob's repair shop, Alpha Auto.

He employed Embry and Quil, and together they would work on incoming cars. Bella spent the mornings in the office, scheduling appointments, handling the busy phones, bookkeeping, and placing orders for auto parts.

While their two older sons were in school, little Joey, only two years old, usually stayed with Sue or played in a corner of Bella's office.

However, keeping their youngest with her at the office proved difficult as little Joey was an explorer, interested in discovering the workings of EVERYTHING. Bella was more busy keeping the kid out of danger zone instead of getting her bookkeeping done. Even Sue, usually the most patient person when it came to kids, was totally overwhelmed by Joey's energy, especially when the little tot started to 'repair' her toaster, the stereo, and any other electrical devices he could get his tiny hands on.

Shortly after Joey shorted out the electrical wiring in the shop by sticking a screwdriver in an outlet, Jacob and Bella had to accept that Joey would be better off at the new tribal pre-school. Luckily, the teachers took him in, even though he actually was still too young. Joey was completely toilet trained already. In fact, he had hated being in diapers from the day of his birth, and because of that he grew up almost entirely diaper free. Apart from that, he was really clever for his age, which also was a plus in the eyes of his teachers.

Jacob thought that maybe Joey being the son of the Chief could have been the decisive factor, and it made him feel uncomfortable, but they needed to balance family, Joey's safety and the shop. Putting Joey in preschool was the only other choice. After just one week Joey had everyone convinced how happy he was in preschool with all the other kids his age.

Yeah, Jake wished it could be different, easier, but he couldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

The kids were fighting. Again.

Bella sighed as she set the table with the help of Jacob. She would never get used to it. "It's normal," Jake would say. "Don't worry too much. You don't understand, because you're an only child." Then he would smile at her sweetly. No matter how often Jacob tried to reassure her, she would always be worried that on one of these days her kids could seriously harm each other.

"I'm the oldest. I'm the leader," Jeremy yelled, his face deep-red from anger, and kicked his brother in the shin. "But I'm stronger, AND bigger. That makes me the leader," Jayden grunted, holding Jeremy in a firm headlock. "I know where mommy keeps the chocolate-" the youngest, Joey, chirped, but stopped, backing away when Jacob stepped between his fighting sons.

He grabbed Jeremy and Jayden by the scruff of their necks, pulling them apart effortlessly.

"First," Jacob declared, sitting them down at the table. "We're Quileute and as you know the Quileute descent from wolves. The wolf leading the pack is called the Alpha. His orders are to be followed at all times." Their sons nodded, listening to him intently, while Bella filled up their plates and sat one dish aside for Billy, who was resting in his room.

"Secondly," Jacob said, pulling his chair out and settling in, waiting for Bella to start eating. No matter how hungry he or their sons were, he made sure that Bella ALWAYS started eating first. The wolf in him growled satisfied, when the first morsel of food disappeared in Bella's mouth.

"Secondly," he continued, "I'm at least twice as big as both of you, twice as old... and..." Jacob grinned, placing a sloppy kiss on Bella's lips. "I get to kiss mommy. That makes ME your Alpha! Now eat!"

Jeremy, Jayden and Joey didn't wait for another "eat" order. They started shoveling food into their ever hungry bellies as if there was no tomorrow.

Jacob gave Bella a wink. He loved teasing the kids, even when Bella sometimes chided him for doing it. He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

The alarm pulled her out of sleep relentlessly. Bella hit the snooze button. Five more minutes. just five more minutes... Like a tiny octopus, Joey was wrapped all around her snoring softly. Her little space heater... Bella woke up some more and reached out behind her. _Jacob? _His side of the bed was empty. Did he get up already? Did he come to bed at all last night? When she had finally gone to bed, he hadn't even been home yet.

Bella sighed. Damn, sometimes she hated that he was out patrolling, risking his life fighting vampires. She always got so scared when he wasn't at home in the morning. Something might have happened to him... or to one of the other wolves...

Bella shoved the thought away. _Up. UP._ She had to get up and get the boys ready for school. She entangled herself from Joey. The kid didn't even stir in his sleep. She rushed into Jacob's sisters' old bedroom, shaking Jeremy and Jayden awake. "Hurry, boys. We're way too late, again." _Her fault. Her fault. _She'd been sitting too long over the bookkeeping last night. She yawned and tumbled into the kitchen, making coffee for herself. She ignored Jeremy and Jayden fighting for the bathroom. She was tired of telling them to be quiet. Neither Billy nor Joey ever woke up from the noise anyway. It was just her who was so touchy about loud noises in the mornings.

She prepared sandwiches, put cereal and milk onto the table, waiting for the kids to come and eat. "Boys! Hurry up! You can't be late _again._" Jeremy finally strolled into the kitchen, grabbed a sandwich and shoved it into his mouth. "Thanks, mom," he mumbled from behind the food. Bella rolled her eyes. "That was supposed to be your _lunch._" Annoyed, she reached for the sandwich stuff again.

She groaned and rubbed her temples. She was getting a headache. Damn. Today of all days. She had to get the monthly settlements ready and drive Billy to the doctor. She also had an appointment at school with Jayden's teacher. _Where was Jacob? _Why didn't he come home? Was he alright?

"Go, go, go now. You better run. School starts in five minutes." Bella shoved her boys out of the house a quarter-hour later. Now it was time to help Billy get ready and wake up Joey. She would meet Jacob at the garage.

When he finally arrived around noon, he would ask her about her morning. She would ask about his night. "Same old. Same old," both of them would answer and know they wouldn't want it any other way.

.

oOo

.

The next years, Jacob slowly cut back phasing. He wanted to grow old with his Bells, and he wanted to spend more time with their three sons. Vampire activity had stopped almost entirely, and the occasional vampire daring to come into their territory was wiped out effortlessly. Only a few wolves wanted to keep phasing for several more years. One of them was Quil, whose imprint, Claire, was barely older than Jacob's first son. Colin and Seth thought it would be wiser to have at least some wolves to protect the tribe - just in case. Jacob couldn't agree more.

"Do you think Jerry and Jay are going to phase when they're a little older?" Bella asked Jacob one night when they sat huddled together in the loveseat, watching TV, and everyone else was sleeping. Jayden recently had turned 10, and Jeremy would soon celebrate his 12th birthday. Both were tall boys, standing at 5'10 and 5'9 already. Jayden had quite the temper, and Jeremy the fiercest sense of justice, but they didn't show any signs that would indicate that they might eventually turn into wolves.

"I hope not," Jacob grumbled, drawing lazy circles on Bella's thigh. "The gene is only triggered when there are bloodsuckers around, but it's really too soon to tell." For a moment, Jacob lost himself in his thoughts. Colin and Brady had been the last boys to phase and that was 12 years ago. He didn't know if a new pack would phase within his sons' generation. Before him there had been two generations where no Quileute had phased into a wolf.

"I hope they don't phase. I want them to have a normal life," Bella said, drawing Jake's attention back. She scooted closer to Jacob, seeking his warmth. Then she looked up at him, smirking mischievously. "Well... the more I think about it... I'm afraid they're more likely to turn into giant pigs than wolves. Have you seen their room lately?" She rolled her eyes, but chuckled under her breath.

Jacob laughed out loud. "You never saw my room when I was their age. I swear... It looked even worse."

"Oh, I can _very well _imagine that_._.." Bella smiled and slightly tilted her head to the side, wordlessly pointing towards the front door. His shoes and his work shirt were strewn across the floor next to a stack of car magazines and mechanic books.

"I'll clean it up later. I promise," Jacob mumbled, looking a little bit embarrassed. Then he cocked an eyebrow suggestively and the pressure of his hands on her thighs increased. "I have to clean myself up as well," he growled, and bent down, nipping the tender skin of her throat. "Haven't had my shower yet. Care to join me?" He lifted his wife up in his arms and carried her into the bathroom, not even waiting for her consent. He knew how much Bella loved it when he just took initiative.

They had a long extended shower, where Bella helped him clean up some especially dirty spots on his body. And, _God_, how he loved the way she felt pressed up against him. He made sure to capture her lips to muffle her moans and cries whenever she came, and when he finally allowed himself to find his own release, he had to brace himself against the shower wall. His legs were so wobbly; he feared they might give out under him. For a moment, he was worried._ Since when did he get weak legs after having sex with Bells? _But then, Bella slapped him on his ass as she brushed past him, stepping out of the shower, and he forgot all about it. "Damn, woman, you're wearing me out." He grinned absolutely satisfied.

"Well, let's catch some sleep. We've got another long day ahead of us," Bella urged and yawned. She took him by his hand and dragged him to their bedroom. The kids, piled up like puppies, occupied their bed. Jacob shrugged and gently pushed their sons to Bella's side of the bed. Then, he lay down on his side, pulling Bella down on top of him. He never minded sharing his bed. In fact, he slept best when he was curled up around his kids and wife. He never wished different.

He clearly wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

At the age of 30, Jacob gave up phasing entirely. Seth took over as the Alpha of a now very small pack.

The call of the wolf was strong, and Jacob felt unbalanced and moody. He could barely control his temper. The smallest things provoked him to start arguing – with his friends, his wife, and even his sons. Jacob loathed himself for that, and he hated even more that he couldn't get it under control.

The same year, Billy died. His condition had grown worse during the last 10 years. At the end, they had needed to feed him and care for all of his needs. Bella and Jacob agreed that death came to Billy as a release. Nevertheless, Jacob had a hard time accepting that his father was gone.

"You don't understand. You still have your parents, Bella," he shouted one evening when she was trying to console him. "I'm all alone now." He stormed out of the house, hiding in the garage.

Bella was hurt. How could he say that? He wasn't alone. Not at all. He had her and their kids and friends. She was telling herself that he only said that because he was grieving, but it hurt nevertheless.

Jacob closed himself off from his family for a long time, not realizing that his actions put a strain on his marriage. One day, when he came home from the car shop, he saw Bella staring out of the window with her arms tightly wrapped around her chest like she used to do all those years ago. Jacob was shocked. _Did he do that to her?_He stepped behind her silently and took her in his arms. "I'm sorry."

Four weeks later, Jacob took his family for a vacation to Hawaii, visiting his sister Rebecca. It was the first holiday trip they ever made, and it was great for all of them. He taught his sons how to surf, while Bella lay in the sun, reading. Jacob and Bella also spent a lot of time alone, exploring the island, while their sons stayed behind with Aunt Rebecca.

Jacob surprised Bella by arranging a small ceremony for them to renew their wedding vows. The ceremony was held on the beach. It was a real wedding, with a real Hawaiian priest. Jacob was relieved that Bella had forgiven him. When she said her "I do", smiling up at him, literally glowing, he realized how incredibly happy they truly were.

The trip ate up all of their savings, and he knew they would need to work hard to save up money when they were back home. But, it was more important that they had worked things out.

They might be broke, but he wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

"Joey, now come here and sit down. If you don't practice your reading, you'll never get better," Bella scolded her 7 year old, but sitting still had never been his strong point.

"I don't wanna!" Joey screamed and in a flare of anger, he reached out, throwing his notebooks off the table.

Bella groaned internally. _Oh no! _She wasn't in the mood for another screaming match with her second-grader. She put her hand on Joey's shoulder, pressing down slightly, but still hard enough to make him aware that she wasn't pleased with him. "Pick that up," she said sternly, locking eyes with the pouting kid.

"NO!" Joey glared right back.

"I said pick it up," Bella repeated, impatience seeping into her voice, but she wouldn't back down.

"You're mean!" he shouted, his russet colored face now deep-red, but he caved eventually and grabbed the books off the floor, albeit grudgingly.

"I know, honey, and still I love you." Bella ruffled his hair, brushing the long, ebony strands out of his face, and placed a kiss on the top of his head. "I'm gonna help you, darling."

The kid sighed and wrapped his arms around her waist, hiding his face in her shirt. "Mommy..."

Two hours later, Jacob had come home from the shop. Bella was still busy watching over her kids' homework. She was exhausted, but instead of sneaking in a little nap, she sat with Jayden, helping him with an essay. Then, he handed her his multiplication test. "Another D?" Bella shook her head in disbelief. Jayden had promised to work harder, since he struggled with his transition to middle school, but actually, he more often than not hung out in the woods or at the beach with his friends.

Jacob wasn't surprised at all. Jayden was the spitting image of him in every way. The boy just wasn't able to sit still for an hour, let alone throughout an entire school day. Jacob scratched his head and ran his hands through his hair (He let it grow out for Bella and it almost touched his shoulders by now). Was it a bad thing to be rather unfazed by his sons' school grades? There were much worse things in the world, _weren't there_? At least they didn't have to worry about Jeremy when it came to studies. School was easy for him, and he actually liked it, a lot. He took after Bella when it came to learning and reading.

"You have to try harder, Jay," Jacob grumbled for good measure, and stifled a yawn. He actually wanted to take a nap when he came home, but he had been greeted by a yelling Bells and arguing kids.

Jacob leaned back on the recliner, giving his Bella a lopsided, encouraging grin, and returned to reading the latest issue of his mechanics magazine out loud to Joey. After all, Joey needed to practice reading, right?

Even when being a parent could be pretty straining, he wasn't complaining. Not really that is.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

With Billy being gone, it was now Jacob's duty to tell the tribes' histories and stories of their people. He fell easily into that role and enjoyed seeing the curious, interested faces of the kids glowing back at him around the bonfires, hanging on his every word.

Jacob was aware that with no more wolves phasing it would be of great importance that the younger generations knew the legends inside out. So he made sure to tell the signs that warned a boy (or girl) was soon going to phase. He wanted all of them to be aware of these signs in case vampire activity would trigger the gene in their future kids. The vampire stories he and the other wolves told were by far the kids' favorites.

Tonight, however, Jacob was restless. He seemed distracted and could barely concentrate on telling the story of brave wolves saving the beautiful girl from newborn, blood-thirsty vampires. His hands had a life of their own, tracing patterns all over Bella's back. Finally, the bonfire came to an end, and Sue and Charlie took the boys with them for a sleep-over.

Jacob wrapped his arm around Bella's shoulders, squeezing gently and pulled her away from the crowd for a walk towards the beach. "Once upon a time," he started in a whisper as they walked along First Beach, "there lived a powerful Alpha and his beautiful wife."

Bella felt tingles crawl up her spine when his deep, warm voice washed over her. Jake led her to their driftwood tree and made her sit down. They still came here on a regular basis; you could say it was their "sacred place".

"They had three sons," he continued, sinking to his knees in front of her. "Tall and strong they were, making the Alpha and his wife very proud." Jacob sighed, brushing his nose along her neck. "But something... _someone._.. was missing," he emphasized, and buried his face between her full breasts.

His hot breath fanned over her. She gasped at the sensation and at Jacob's words. She was too curious to find out what the _powerful Alpha _was missing.

Jake's eyes met hers as he came back to her lips. "The Alpha wished he had a daughter as beautiful as his wife," he breathed against Bella's mouth and kissed her.

Bella shivered slightly and pulled back. "Uh, Jacob..." she whispered. "What are you saying?"

Jacob inhaled deeply. His hands slid down her sides, following the outline of her waist and hips. "You don't know how good you smell, honey. Enticing. Inviting." He crawled between her legs, wrapping his large hands around her thighs, and suggested huskily, "Let's make a baby tonight."

Bella suddenly felt very light-headed. "Better not," she croaked, but tilted her head, giving Jake better access to her neck. "Our boys are quite a handful already."

"And you're doing soooo great, Bells. You're a fantastic mother. I just wish… we had a daughter," Jacob insisted, suckling at her collarbone. "I've thought about it for a while, Bells. I could cut down working at the shop to help you with the boys and the baby..." His tongue flicked out, licking over the entire length of her neck.

Bella moaned. "Jake... I really don't know. The age difference will be really big," she stuttered helplessly. She was so wet and ready for him. "And I was just so happy getting a full night of undisturbed sleep..."

"Like I said, sweetie, I'll be there for you. You're not alone in this." Jacob now kissed her fully on her mouth, and grasped her hips, pulling her into his body. "God, your scent drives me crazy."

Bella whimpered. How could she resist him when he was like that? "Jake…"

"Sshhhhh, we don't need to decide tonight, Bells. Just... God... I want you, baby. I need you so bad."

.

_[…Deleted scene due to graphic content. Find entire scene on Jacob Black N Pack…]_

_._

He damn sure wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

They had created life that night, of course, but Bella only realized it as the morning sickness set in.  
>She jumped into her car, drove to the pharmacy like a maniac and bought a pregnancy test. When it turned positive, she nearly freaked out. Bella was mad at herself, but mad at Jacob, too. How come she always gave in when he charmed her into something? Would it always be like that forever?<p>

By early evening, Jacob came home from the car shop, totally clueless, until Bella started throwing things at him. "Are you crazy?" He dodged a lunch bucket. "What's wrong with you, woman?" he yelled, catching the dish-soap bottle, vegetables and at last the pregnancy test. "OH! Are you..."

Bella started crying and slumped exhausted onto a kitchen chair. Jacob closed in, carefully, finally trapping her tear-stained face between his hands. "Shhhh, honey. Don't cry. I'm here. I'm here..." He rocked her gently until her tears subsided.

"I'm too old for this shit." Bella hiccupped, wiping her cheeks clean on his shirt. Her eyes drooped. She was sooo tired. Outside the kids were fighting. Why were they always fighting? "Hold me, Jake."

"Aren't you happy, honey?" Jacob asked, biting his lower lip, and gathered her in his arms. He felt guilty.

"Dunno," Bella mumbled. "Maybe." She fell asleep in Jake's arms as he whispered words of reassurance to her.

He carried her to bed, fixed sandwiches for his sons, supervised their homework and got them  
>ready for bed and another school day.<p>

Later, he lay in bed, letting the gravity of the "new situation" sink in.

Bella turned to him in a groggy half-sleep state. "Jake..."

He pulled her into his chest and pushed her long, mahogany strands from her face. "I'm sorry, honey..." he started in a gravelly voice.

"Don't be," she insisted, kissing him. "It takes two to make a baby. I was right there with you…" she whispered against his lips with a sleepy smile. "If you're happy, I'm happy. I love you, Jake. I love our life and our family." Her face glowed in the moonlight.

He kissed her again, letting her know without words how much he loved her. Wasn't he the luckiest guy on the planet?

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Their sons were _NOT_ enthusiastic when Bella and Jacob told them the news. _A baby?_

After a little while, they got used to the idea of becoming big brothers, and even later they started to like it. They were very protective of their mom, helped her a lot and all around gave their best to be good. About one thing they were absolutely sure, they wanted the baby to be a girl.

This time, the pregnancy demanded a lot out of Bella, and then she struggled with premature labor. She wasn't 20 anymore, she often complained, but gently stroked her belly when the baby moved and kicked. She adored the little baby growing inside of her. She couldn't wait to hold it in her arms soon.

Jacob stayed true to his promise and reduced his time working at the car shop. He totally took over running the house, doing laundry, and cooking their meals. He didn't allow Bella to even lift a finger.

Jacy was born five weeks early, scaring everyone. Jacob barely dared to touch her, when the doctor showed him his little girl for the first time. His daughter was so tiny, only 5 pounds 5 ounces. She looked like a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest, and Jacob was scared out of his mind for her.  
>But she was a fighter. Right from the beginning, she was breathing completely on her own despite the great effort it took for her, and nursed from Bella's breasts like a pro.<p>

They were allowed to go home after just two days to everyone's delight.

From that day on, Jacob and his boys became a well-practiced pack of over protective... men. Jacy practically lived on their bodies._ Someone_, and that meant not only Bella and Jacob, but also the boys,_ always_carried and held her. They all used the wrap from when Jayden and Joey were babies. Jacob bought a new pink baby sling, he liked using or they just carried her in their arms. None of them ever wanted to put her down. None of them could bear for her to be left alone for a minute, and in return, Jacy was the happiest, most content baby ever, rewarding her daddy and brothers with the most continuous, heart melting, smiles, coos and giggles from any baby girl ever.

But it wasn't always sunshine and roses with their little daughter. During her first months of life, Jacy often got sick, had fevers, coughs, ear infections, and even pneumonia once. Nights were often all about soothing the coughing baby, trying to get her fevers down, making her inhale steaming vapors, or just walking up and down, when her ears hurt so much she cried. Those were the worst nights. Jacy, so strong and brave NEVER cried, and when she did the men in her life felt her pain tenfold and were beside themselves with concern and anxiety.

It all got a lot better when Jacy turned one. Just like Bella had told them it would.

Jacob was absolutely in love with his daughter. She was so beautiful with her curly brown hair and deep-blue eyes that she had inherited from her Grandma Renee. When Jacy smiled for the first time, she smiled for Jake. Jake was the first person she reached her chubby little arms to. Her first word was _Daddy_, her first tooth was discovered biting Jake's huge finger, and her first steps were enthusiastically towards her daddy, the two of them grinning like fools at each other!

He couldn't be happier. It was good he had insisted on having another baby, he crowed one day as Jacy slept peacefully in his arms. Bella agreed, ruffling through his hair.

She wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob, Embry, Paul, and Sam planned a guys' weekend camping trip with all of their kids - except those who still were too young. They left at dawn on a Saturday and planned to spend the entire weekend, till Sunday evening out in the woods on the mountain.

Bella and little Jacy stayed behind. Bella was worried that something might happen to one of them. What if they came across a vampire? Jacob had laughed at her, saying that after all they still were werewolves. The wolf would only "sleep" inside him; he could phase again at any time and effectively protect their sons.

Very reluctantly, Bella let her "men" go and Jacob took off with his sons, 16, 14 and 10 by now, who were excitedly jumping around him like crazed pups.

Embry, Paul, Sam and Jacob shot each other secret glances when they passed the big clearing just outside La Push, where once the battle between the newborns and them went down. Everything had turned for the better for Jacob that day.

Jacob smiled to himself as he watched his kids roughhousing with his old pack mates' kids. These kids might not phase, but he was sure they all behaved like a pack of puppies. _Had he been like this with Quil and Embry when he was a kid? _

They went further up, reaching rougher terrain, and he soon had his hands full keeping Joey from climbing up the rocks and tall firs. The kid constantly challenged his older brothers, wanting to find out who was the fastest runner or the best rock climber. Enjoying the fun the kids had, Jacob wasn't always careful. He didn't slip once or twice, no, he slipped and fell three times, and Embry wouldn't stop poking fun at him. "Bella's clumsiness is rubbing off on you," Embry teased, and held his hand out to help his friend up.

Jacob grinned good-naturedly and shrugged. "Wouldn't have it any other way."

But, deep down inside he was terrified. He felt something was wrong. Very wrong.

.

.


	3. Part III I Heavy in your Arms

_**I'm totally sure you'll hate me for making this one-shot to a four, and now, FIVE shot. You need to tell me if it gets boring. LOL I'd love to hear your thoughts or at least leave me a 'was here' when you don't want to leave a big message.** **Reviews get me going.**_

**A/N: My sincere thank to my fabulous betas, namely Jake's Girl and Jakejunkie. Even when real life was sucking huge monkey balls we were right with me. You don't know how much it means to me. You two are great. **

* * *

><p>.<p>

_**Not Any Other Way**_

_**Part III**__**-I**_

**_~~ Heavy in your Arms ~~_**

**_._**

**_.  
><em>**

Jeremy had his first girlfriend at the age of 17.

Bella discovered this when she came home and found Joey peek through the keyhole of the boys' bedroom. Jacy, sitting on Bella's hip, started to nestle at her blouse, clearly wanting to have snack right now. "Shhh, give me a second, honey," she cooed to the toddler, and gently touched Joey's shoulder.

"What are you doing, Joey?" she asked her curious 10 year old. Then her eyes got wide as saucers when she heard a hushed groan followed by a giggle.

"Jerry won't let me come in, Mom. He wants to be ALONE with Hannah," Joey complained pouting.

"Joey, when Jerry wants to be _alone _it means that he doesn't want to be spied on, either. You can't be a peeping Tom," Bella chided gently, but stifled a smile and tousled her youngest son's hair. She heard another moan and decided to step in before things in there got out of hand. She pounded against the door. A girl squeaked and Jeremy started cursing. "You better be decent when I come in, kids," Bella shouted, and prepared herself for the upcoming conversation.

Where did the time go? It seemed like yesterday when Charlie found her and Jacob making out in her truck. Now it was on her to have a serious talk with her son. Bella smiled a little when she turned the knob, opening the door.

Not for anything in the world would she have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob suggested they should go ahead and renovate Billy's room, so Jeremy could have his own room - now that he had a girlfriend AND the intense learning he had to do for his finals.

Clearing out his late father's room was very difficult for Jacob. He hadn't stepped one foot inside since the day Billy died. He started sorting through his parents' things. Jacob found that he could deal with looking through Billy's books and magazines, and also to his surprise, it was actually fun to look at the old photo albums that showed his father and mother as kids, teenagers and newlyweds. The hardest part, however, was finding Billy's leather jacket he used to wear on his fishing trips and his mom's yellowed wedding dress. He pressed his face into the dress, hoping to find a remainder of his mother's smell, but even with his still enhanced senses he could only catch the faintest whiff of lavender.

He felt tears spring into his eyes, but he fought them back. His parents were gone and there was nothing he could do about that.

When Bella came in to check in on him, she found him lost in his thoughts, caressing his mother's dress absentmindedly. She gently dropped Jacy in his lap and wrapped her arms around him, rocking him comfortingly. "Come, I'll help you," she then offered and began to pack away the photo albums and all the other things she thought they should keep into big boxes.

Together, they had emptied out the room in little under three hours. When his boys came home from school he taught them how to remove wallpaper, fill in drill holes, and paint walls.

By the end of the second day, they had finished the renovation work and arranged Jeremy's furniture. Jacob's legs were hurting. He probably needed to work out more, he thought. Now that he wasn't phasing anymore, he was slacking a little in the stamina department.

He looked around the room, watching how Jeremy proudly sorted his books into his new shelf, and felt as if a heavy weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He remembered so much of his childhood during the last two days, he actually felt a lot closer to his parents right now.

He walked out of the room, lit a candle and placed it on the window sill. Bella came to stand next to him and placed a picture of his parents beside the burning candle.

It would be nice if he still had his parents around him, but living and dying - that was the circle of life. That was how it should be.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Alice Cullen called and had a long chat with Bella. She wanted to know how the boys were doing and if little "Miss Sunshine" was alright. Alice was still beside herself with joy about them having a baby girl - _finally_. ("I thought the dog can only make boys." - Bella actually growled at her for using the word 'dog'.) Alice laughed and apologized, saying it was only fun. Then she added. "I'd so love to go shop for girly stuff for Jacy. What a pity I can't come and see her."

Bella read her easily and grinned when Alice sheepishly asked if the no-visits-from-vampires-rule still applied. "Yes, Alice, it still applies. It's for the best when you not come here. I'll email you a couple of pictures, tho." No. Bella really didn't feel sorry. It was better vampires stayed far, far away from her boys.

They talked for a while, and Alice told her that she could finally see glimpses of Jacob in her visions, but they still were very unclear, probably because her husband had been a werewolf for so long. Alice ended the call, saying. "Bye, Bella. See you soon."

Bella wondered what that would mean, but then she forgot all about it as her everyday life ran its course. Four days later, a huge packet arrived, stuffed with cute dresses, shirts, skirts and pants for Jacy, Barbies, Little Pony figures, stuffed animals, and tons of crayons. It also contained new clothes for the boys in all the right sizes and a brand new laptop for Jeremy. A card was tucked on it. "You'll need it for college. Much success. Alice"

Jacob's eyed everything and snorted annoyed. "I can take care of my children all on my own. Thank you very much."

Bella knew that Alice's gifts were upsetting Jacob, but she hadn't been able to convince Alice to stop sending them in all those years. Even though those presents were making her feel uncomfortable from time to time as well, she had learned to benefit from it. After all, there were enough months when money was tight and the kids really needed new clothes right now.

Jacob would just have to deal. Bella smiled to herself, knowing exactly how to provide him with a distraction. She had her own _special _ways to make him feel better.

She waded through the mountains of clothes and toys, already planning where to put all that new stuff, and took Jacob's hand. "Uhm... boys, I'm sure Emily baked cookies this morning, and I need to discuss something with your daddy. Why don't you go over to Emily's and take Jacy with you?"

She chose to ignore Jeremy's grin and Jayden's sassy remark, and leaned into Jacob. "Why don't you show me again why I need you so much, Jake?" she whispered into his ear, and in response, he dragged her into their bedroom, closing the door behind them with a little more force than necessary.

"Shut up and go!" he yelled through the door as his boys broke out in howling laughter, and turned to face Bella. Then he showed his wife what she'd been asking for. Thoroughly. After all, he was the one who could keep her satisfied.

Despite the arrival of extravagant gifts for the kids, he knew she'd chosen and built a life with him.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

The fighting between their boys started again. It was worse than ever before. After countless tries to settle differences and cleaning wounds, the reason for their fighting finally became clear. Jayden, 16, and Jeremy, almost 18, were in love - with the same girl - and neither of them would back down.

"Jeremy, you've got to understand... this fighting can't continue any longer," Bella insisted, taking her son aside. She wanted this conversation to be private, and it gave Jacob the opportunity to talk to Jayden without Jeremy overhearing it. She walked with him into his room and closed the door behind them. "Zoe has to decide. She can't lead the two of you on like that," she said to Jeremy.

Zoe was Emily and Sam's first-born. Bella didn't particularly like that girl. She had been watching Zoe for a while already and had a feeling that this girl liked teasing the boys around her. Jeremy groaned and clenched his hands. "She doesn't lead us on," he ground out, defensive of said girl, and leaned against the wall, his arms crossed before his chest. "I love her."

"Does she feel the same for you?" Bella pressed.

"I didn't tell her yet. She's so hard to talk to, Mom." Suddenly, Jeremy looked really insecure. "I think she only sees me as her friend. If at all."

Something familiar tugged at Bella's heart. "Oh, Jerry..." she breathed and took her son into her arms.

Too soon, Jeremy gently pulled out of the embrace and straightened to his full height again. "I'll fight for her. She belongs with me."

"Please, Jeremy, listen to me," Bella pleaded and sat down on his bed, motioning him to sit down next to her. "You're going to graduate this summer, go to college and live in Arizona with Grandma Would you give that up for Zoe?"

He shrugged, staring blankly into space. "I guess I shouldn't... I've got a full ride..." he finally murmured. "It would really be stupid." Suddenly, Jeremy threw a pen, he had been fiddling with, across the room. "ARGH! Gosh darn it!" he yelled, and then his shoulders slumped forward. His hands went into his hair as he pulled his head down between his knees.

Bella started rubbing his back comfortingly. She didn't even flinch at his outburst. She never thought it would happen, but she had _sort of_gotten used to her hot-headed sons' temper tantrums. "Listen, Jerry. If she's the one, she'll wait for you. And you'll wait for her. But maybe you'll fall in love with another girl..."

"I'll never fall in-" Jeremy said, his temper flaring up already again, but a loud crash outside his room stopped him mid-sentence.

Bella jumped up and practically flew out of his room. "What's going on? What are you boys doing now?" she shouted, expecting another fight - this time between Jayden and Joey - but instead she found Jacob on the floor, a triumphant looking Jayden sitting on his chest. Jacy, playing with a doll in her high-chair, applauded and squealed.

"HA!" cheered 16 year old Jayden. "I won! Dad went down like a rock! You owe me ten bucks, old man!"

"I'll show you old man!" With a quick, fluid movement, Jacob threw Jayden off his chest and reached out, bringing him into a firm headlock, from which Jayden couldn't wrestle free anymore. Jayden wheezed and huffed, his head turning red in his effort to fight his father. "Never lose focus," Jacob lectured smugly, tightening his grip. "And never turn your back on your enemy."

Jacob let go of Jayden and stood up. How in the world had his son been able to kick him off his feet in the first place? He hid his concern behind a broad smile as he slapped Jayden on his shoulder. Only Bella noticed something was bothering him.

When this day came to an end, Bella snuggled into Jacob's chest. "When your kids are stronger than you, does it mean we're growing old?" she mumbled.

"Maybe," Jacob answered and kissed her softly. "But that's how it's supposed to be, honey. The natural path. I wouldn't have it any other way."

Zoe was history within the next three weeks. Then, Jeremy and Jayden were competing for another girl.

.

oOo

.

Jeremy graduated in June. His valedictorian speech brought Bella to tears. She listened as her son talked about making the right choices now because his parents had made the right choice in the past. If only he would know how much truth his words held.

Jake pressed Bella's hand reassuringly and kissed her on the top of her head. She lightened up at the mention that they were the youngest parents sitting here today.

A couple of weeks later Jeremy moved to Arizona to spend the summer with his Grandma Renee and Phil. After the summer, he enrolled in Arizona State University where he would complete his bachelor degree and apply for Law school.

Christmas came and New Year. Jeremy's visit with his parents was way too short. He went back to Arizona the first week of January, and Jacob's 35th and Jayden's 17th birthday was celebrated without him. Jacob mentioned that the house somehow felt less sophisticated without Jeremy. He smirked while saying that; Bella knew how proud he was of Jeremy and that he was doing so great in college.

Bella and Jacob missed their oldest terribly, but it wasn't like they suddenly were feeling bored. Jayden and Joey still needed all of their attention; guidance, advice and lots and lots of patience. And then there was Jacy, who demanded Bella teach her how to read.

No, it definitely wasn't boring at the Black's.

Jacob and Bella agreed if they were allowed to start their life from the beginning, they wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

"Daddy, you gotta bring me," three years old Jacy announced in her chipper voice and tugged at Jacob's hand. She was dressed, washed up, and combed, all in all ready to be brought to pre-school. She liked going there, even when it meant she couldn't be with her Daddy for at least six hours.

"Of course, Miss Lil Bits, at your service." Jacob mock-bowed and Jacy giggled. "Your shoes?"

"Yep." She lifted her feet, first the left one then the right one, showing Jacob her laced boots.

"Jacket?"

"Yep." Jacy spun round with outstretched arms. "Zipped it up myself!"

"Backpack?"

"Check." She grabbed her pink Little Pony backpack and put it on awkwardly. The sleeves of her jacket got caught in the shoulder straps and rode up her arms. Jacy let loose a frustrated, high-pitched shriek, and Jacob hurried to help her out with the sleeves before the noise permanently damaged his eardrums.

"Stop, Jacy. I've got it. I've got it. Good to go? Say 'bye' to mommy, darling." Jacob picked Jacy up and carried her into the kitchen, where Bella washed the dishes.

"Bye, mommy," Jacy said, calm again, and waved her hand.

"Bye, bunny," Bella answered, and blew her a kiss. "Don't forget the cap, Jake. Remember, her ears."

"I know," Jacob called, and they left. Jacy put on the cap on her own, and she was allowed to ride on her daddy's shoulders. Jacob strode smoothly; it didn't take long to reach the pre-school.

"Be careful up there," Jacob warned as Jacy lifted her hands, straining to reach the sky.

His daughter giggled. "Gee up, Daddy! Faster." She pounded her tiny, booted feet into his collarbones, urging him to break out into their obligatory race. Jacob always ran the last part of the way.

"Morning, Chief!" an elderly lady greeted him, when they passed her house, pouring out a bucket over her door steps.

"Mrs. Morris." Jacob tapped the side of his head in greeting and put Jacy down as she started to wiggle and squirm, announcing that she wanted down and race him. "At three," he said, knowing that he would give his daughter a head-start. Suddenly, he felt this strange tingling start to creep up his right leg that nowadays often had been bothering him.

"THREE!" Jacy yelled and lunged forward, speeding off as fast as she could.

"Hey, I didn't even count down..." Jacob complained, rubbing his numbing leg. Damn. What was it that made his legs go dead? Argh, he hated the pins and needles-feeling.

He hobbled after Jacy, praying that nobody would see his pathetic attempt at running.

Jacy won.

.

oOo

.

A couple of days later, Bella was in her kitchen, kneading bread dough, when Jacob walked in, cursing under his breath. Seeing Bella, he stopped and leaned against the door frame. He hadn't expected her to be home.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" she asked, similar surprised. It was only 10 in the morning. Not that she minded, but he was supposed to be at Alpha Auto until six.

"I forgot this contract," Jacob answered with a frown on his face. "I need it today." He slowly and deliberately walked down the hall, trying to hide the slight limp, and picked up the contract from his bedside table. Bella still worked the dough when he returned to the kitchen. He gave himself a couple of seconds to admire her. He loved the way she looked with her arms and hands covered in flour, the white mess sprinkled all over her face and chest. She was bare-feet, too. He liked that a lot, and it took his mind off his gloomy thoughts, which he was grateful for. "Are you taking time off, Bells?"

"Yeah, I need to get some house work done. I'll be in tomorrow, though." She turned around, looking at Jacob more closely. Something in his voice sounded off, he looked bothered and he still had that frown on his face. "What's wrong, Jake?"

He closed in on her and wrapped his arms around her. "Nothing," he answered morosely, trying to hide the discomfort in his legs. Maybe this strange tingling numbness would go away soon. Maybe, he was just overreacting. "I've missed you at the shop. That's all." Jacob pressed his face into her hair, breathing in her scent. She didn't need to worry about him.

"Uh-hu," Bella said, and put her arms around him. He clearly needed the comfort. "You sure, you're okay?" she asked, holding her hands awkwardly away from him. She didn't want to get flour and dough all over his clothes.

Jacob sank into her embrace and sighed deeply. "I just need you right now, Bells. Can you hold me for a minute?"

Bella wrapped her arms protectively around him. She knew something was bothering him deeply. More so, he seemed shaken. "What's going on, honey?" She wished he wouldn't always keep his sorrow to himself.

Jacob shook his head, no, but leaned in to kiss her on the cheek. A little kiss led to another one and soon, they kissed passionately. A heated groan slipped past her lips, urging him on, and he grabbed her by her hips, placing her onto the counter.

In response, Bella opened her thighs, inviting him to come closer. Her hands went up into his hair, flour-covered hands forgotten, pulling it a little harder than intended. He groaned again and pushed his hips into her.

"Ewww. Gross!" was to be heard behind them and a gagging noise. "Please, someone gouge my eyes out..."

Startled, they pulled apart. "Jayden? Why aren't you in school?" Bella asked, and brought her hands up to straighten her shirt. Jacob grinned when she spread the flour all over her hips.

Bella went in full mommy mode as she recognized Jayden's face. He was really pale. Only his cheeks had a feverish glow. "Are you sick?"

"Yeah, wasn't feeling well. The nurse sent me home," Jayden mumbled and trudged into his room. He fell down on his bed, breathing heavily.

Bella left Jacob standing in the kitchen and ran after Jayden. She sat down next to him. _Oh, what a day._Not only was Jacob acting weird, now Jayden seemed to be crabby, too. She could tell that he was angry. Very angry. "Okay, spill," she said and sighed. "What's bothering you?"

"I got into a fight with Joey, and then Mr. Woods wanted us to stop, but Joey just kept on and on. I got so angry... I had to punch him or I would've jumped out of my skin..." Jayden reported and rubbed his face.

"You hit Mr. Woods?" she shouted exasperated, and threw her hands up in the air.

"Gosh. NO, mom. Joey. I punched Joey. But not too hard... I didn't break his nose. I swear..." he answered from behind his hands.

Bella buried her hands in her hair, tugging it hard. She was tired of the constant fighting, but she tried to be objective. "You had an argument and you became angry?" she summarized.

Jayden nodded.

"You were so angry it made your skin crawl?" she asked, suddenly feeling very light-headed. Lately, Jayden seemed to get upset very fast, and his outbursts were really intense. She sometimes even thought he was shaking when he was especially angry. "And suddenly you were feeling sick," Bella concluded in a thin voice.

Jayden nodded again and curled up on his bed. "Mom, I'm hurting all over..."

A lump formed in her throat and she reached out tentatively. When she touched his skin, it was blazing hot, reaching a temperature she was very familiar with.

"JAKE!" she screamed and then everything went black...

.

oOo

.

Jayden didn't phase, although all signs were there. He had grown a lot, had packed muscles, and he was burning up. Not to speak from his mood swings and temper outbursts...

Bella and Jacob had long discussions with the other (active and non-active) pack members. Jayden seemed the only boy who showed the signs so far. They went through the legends, trying to find out if or if not Jayden would eventually phase. Seth finally pointed out that the trigger for THEM to phase had been the Cullens living in the area. Now, that there were no more vampires around, this trigger was missing. But maybe, since Jayden had the "true" Alpha blood in him, the wolf in him was so strong that he would phase at some time or another.

Jacob was frustrated. There was nothing he could do. He couldn't help Jayden, and this was eating on him. He would have to wait and see - something he still wasn't good at.

After a meeting at Seth's, Jacob was tired and wanted to leave. Bella would be waiting for him. When he went to get up from his seat, the unwelcome, but familiar prickling sensation raced up his legs. He bent down and rubbed up and down his legs, trying to get the slight pain to go away.

"What's wrong, Jake?" Seth asked.

"Sitting too long. My leg went to sleep," Jake said, tapping against his thighs. A crease formed between his brows as he rose awkwardly, ignoring Seth's outstretched hand.

Maybe it was about time to see a doctor, but his body temperature and metabolism were still not back to normal human standards. Should he ask for Bella's advice or would it be better to just wait it out a bit longer?

"Bye, Seth," he murmured and stepped out of the house. He chose to walk the long way home. It would give him more time to think.

.

oOO

.

It was one of those rare warm nights in La Push. They've had a bonfire and ate a lot of Hamburgers and Hot Dogs. They sung some traditional songs and a couple of popular ones, and Jacob had been telling the tale of Báyaķ, the Raven, and Ákil, the bear. Now, the kids were tired and he declared the bonfire closed.

He helped Bella gather up blankets, plastic dishes, and empty soda cans while Joey and Jay chased Jacy around the fire. Later on, he helped Jacy with her bath, blow-dried her hair and brought her to bed. Joey and Jayden went to bed half an hour later, not necessarily on their own free will.

When all the kids were sleeping, Bella and Jacob went to bed as well and although both of them were tired, they decided they weren't too tired to make love to each other.

Bella had her eyes closed, enjoying Jacob's slow moves. Her fingers played in his hair, softly stroking the thick, soft strands. The desire he felt, the pleasure, it was a slow burn, like a tender caress. He sighed, then moaned softly, earning a similar soft moan and shudder from Bella. He loved those nights when love-making was lazy, and tender, and slow.

But then, suddenly, Bella stiffened under him. "Jake, stop," she whispered and squeezed his shoulder, calling his attention. "I'm feeling watched."

Jacob froze and looked at her with a frown. He could feel it now, too. "I was so close," he whispered complaining and turned his head towards the door. He saw a tiny figure standing there. "What's up, Jacy, honey?" he asked, pulling the sheets over him and Bella. How much had Jacy seen? How much did she understand already?

"There's a monster under my bed, daddy," Jacy whimpered, pressing her teddy bear close to her body. She stared at them with wide eyes.

Bella got up, quickly pulling on Jacob's discarded boxers. "Now, let's see, honey. A monster... isn't it too big to hide under your bed? Why don't we go and have a look?"

"I want daddy..." Jacy wailed and tried to crawl into their bed.

Bella snatched her daughter and placed her on her hip. "_I'm_going with you. Look, daddy's almost asleep."

Jacy frowned, but nodded. They then checked under Jacy's bed and searched through her closet, until the little girl was convinced that there was no monster hovering in her room. "We're here to protect you, Jacy. Always. Now, go to sleep again."

She switched off the light and went back to Jacob, who was waiting to finish what they had started.

He instantly rubbed himself against her ass when she lay down. "Too tired now, Bells?" he murmured, kissing the tender spot behind her ear.

Bella pressed back, wiggling her butt invitingly. "No, just go ahead, I'll be with you." She purred, wiggled some closer, and took his hand, placing it on her breast.

The door opened again, and Jacob groaned, slightly frustrated.

"I can't sleep. I want to sleep with you, mommy." Jacy climbed into the bed, snuggling close into Bella's side. She fell asleep at once.

Belly huffed, turned onto her back and then giggled. "G'nite, Jake," she said, and kissed him.

"Night, Bells," Jake answered, kissed her back, and tucked himself into Bella's other side. "You gotta love your kids," he muttered to himself. It took him a long time to fall asleep.

He might be slightly frustrated, but he knew he wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

Jacob couldn't turn a blind eye on his condition anymore. Anxiety about his failing physical abilities weighed heavily on him. His muscles became weaker rapidly. With increased regularity, his legs felt numb and would give out under him and that at the age of 35.

_What the hell was wrong with him? _

He finally decided to tell Bella.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" she asked, cradling his face between her hands, worry marking her beautiful features. She had sensed that something was up, but knowing the real extent of his problems left her stunned.

Two phone calls later, she informed Jacob that he would be consulting Dr. Cullen—without further discussions-and that Sue and Charlie would come and take care of the kids.

The next day, they were on their way to Anchorage, Alaska, where Dr. Cullen was currently working. Jacob had his lips set to a grim line, grinding his teeth hard. "Will _he _be there?" he finally ground out, glaring at Bella.

Bella shook her head. "No. Not that I know of, honey," she replied clueless. "Why would you care?" She hadn't seen Edward since the break-up; she hadn't talked to him, either. She never asked Alice about him. Edward was her past, but Jacob was her... _everything_.

Then it dawned on her.

Could Jacob be afraid what would happen if she saw Edward Cullen again after all those years and how it would affect her? She tenderly stroked Jacob's arm. "Look, I really don't care if Edward will be there or not. I love you!"

.

oOo

.

During the next week Jacob had to go through the whole train of medical examination. At the end of the week, Carlisle confirmed that Jacob was suffering from a muscular dystrophy*. The good thing was that the wolf gene had delayed the onset, because usually, this kind of illness would begin weakening the human body around the age of eighteen and sooner.

Carlisle Cullen suggested that Jacob might try medical treatment, but told him that it was no cure. In his case, medication could only aim at controlling the symptoms and slow down the progression of the illness at best.

The flight home was silent. Jacob was distant. He couldn't bear the thought of becoming a burden to Bella, especially since he knew what to expect. He had taken care of his father all those years. The prospect was that he would be ending up in a wheel chair and become an invalid. His whole world was falling apart.

"Bella, I'm scared," Jacob eventually admitted. His hands were cold; he trembled.

Bella took his hand and began talking to him quietly, but insistent. He wasn't alone in this. Did he remember what they promised each other on their wedding day?

_For better and for worse?__ In sickness and in health? _

She would be with him every step of the way. He had given her so much; he had saved her from herself. After Edward had left, he had always been there for her, taken care of her, and warmed up her life. Now it was her turn and she was planning to give him all of her strength and all of her heart. That's what lovers were supposed to do, right? They were in this together.

She wished he wouldn't have to face this illness, but they couldn't change a thing about it and if she had to decide again – Jacob or Edward – she would chose Jacob hands down. Every time.

"No!" She shook her head vehemently. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

.

oOo

.

They told the kids, Charlie and Sue, and his pack mates as soon as they were back.

Jeremy asked if he should come back home. Jacob said no, because right now he was okay and Jeremy couldn't do anything anyway. "Stay where you are and get your degree. I'm fine and I won't be a burden to my children.

Bella hissed disapprovingly at Jacob's choice of words. It hurt her hearing him talk like this.

"Ah, sorry man. That sucks," said Embry and slapped Jacob on his shoulder sympathetically, while Sam wanted to know the prospects. Jacob answered darkly, "I'm going to deteriorate slowly but surely. That's what I'm expecting."

Bella turned away, hiding her tears.

"At least…," Jacob said to Charlie. "Our house is already adapted for wheelchairs."

For a while, Charlie was at a loss of words. His voice was rough when he answered, "You're a strong man, Jacob. I know you can handle what fate has planned for you..."

Jacob stared into space.

Then his face crumbled.

"Fate my ass!" he finally snorted and stormed out of the house. He didn't come back that night. He wasn't aware how much Bella cried, seeking comfort in her father's arms.

.

oOo

.

Jacob gave medication a try, and he started running and working out on a regular basis. He wanted do anything to get better! If he trained his muscles he was sure he could maintain his strength. Together with the medication he was sure to get his condition stabilized.

He shouldn't have set his hopes too high, but he had, and neither the medication nor the workout program showed the slightest effect. His high metabolism would just burn the medication off, before it could even start working.

Jacob was devastated.

Carlisle insisted on seeing Jacob for a second time. They agreed to meet at the hospital in Port Angeles since Jacob didn't want to risk Jayden as much as catching whiff of Carlisle Cullen. Jacob knew it would only need the slightest trigger to provoke Jayden's first phase and wanted to prevent that by all means.

After another thorough examination and seeing that medication had failed, Carlisle pointed out that Jacob might consider start phasing again. He wasn't sure if it would stave off a quick progression of his condition, but it was likely.

"NO!" was Jacob's resolute response. He was determined to grow old with Bella. There was no way that he'd risk outliving Bella longer then absolutely necessary.

In his eyes, continuing to phase was not a solution, and he was strict on that.

.

oOo

.

The next couple of months were rough.

Jacob spent a lot of time alone, brooding, moping, and shutting everyone out. He was too young to rely on other people's help. _Why him? _He had fought so hard for EVERYTHING in his life. An easy life-was that too much to ask for? Wallowing in self-pity, he didn't see that Bella and his kids suffered as well.

Joey, age 13 by now, became even more unruly than he already was. He didn't obey Bella's rules anymore, and Jacob just ignored everything going on around him. If it wasn't for Jayden helping his mother out whenever or where ever he could... Bella would be falling apart. She worried over Jacob constantly. She was desperate. If only Jacob would talk and share his thoughts with her...

She never thought her life would become such a nightmare. Only months ago she had vowed she wouldn't want it any other way. But she didn't want it like this. She wanted her Jacob back. In whatever condition he was. She just wanted him back. She needed him to talk to her, to take her in his arms, to let her take him in her arms.

She could handle whatever life was throwing at her. Together they would make it. That was what marriage was supposed to be, but not like this.

Not like this.

oOo

Jayden found Jacob holed up in the garage, smoking in the dark, and thought he'd have a little fun with his old man. "You kids better not be smokin´ out there!" he barked in the gruffest imitation of his father he could muster.

He heard a nearly silent "Oh, shit!" whisper against the darkness and a bright red ember flew to the dirty floor, scatting even smaller red embers about, before a heavy boot stepped forward, crushing the butt, and Jacob appeared from the dark corner.

"Wow! Dad...can I get a butt?" Jayden said, deciding to harass his father.

"Don't be a smart ass, Jay, I'm not in the mood..." Jacob grumbled stalking passed his 17 year old son.

"Oh no! No worries Dad, nothing _smart_ goin' on around here... just a bunch of cigarette smoking," Jayden snapped back pointedly. There was a lot of anger pent up in the young man. He couldn't understand. How could his dad be so ignorant of his mom's feelings? He was avoiding everyone, retreating to his garage and any time someone interrupted his solitude he barked at them.

"Jayden..." Jacob growled in warning.

"How do you think Mom will feel about this," Jayden threatened, all the anger rising to the surface.

"Jayden, look." Jacob stepped closer.

"No! You LOOK!" Jayden shouted. "Mom is worried sick about you. And now this? You're out here SMOKING?" He screamed out all of his fury right in his dad's face, and his hands started shaking. "Cigarettes aren't called coffin nails for no reason. They're bad for your health and may shorten your life. Even little kids know that… and you… even though you're having health issues… you… you…" The trembling got worse. "You just go and have a smoke?"

Jacob recognized his son's fury. He felt the heat rolling off in waves from Jayden's skin. He saw the shimmer of his outline, the darkening of his son's eyes. His blood ran cold. This couldn't be! This mustn't happen. He had to react. And fast. It had only taken a fight similar to this between his dad and him all those years ago as the trigger for his first phase.

He was willing to do anything to help Jayden regain control. _He was NOT ready to deal with the wolf taking Jayden. Not tonight. Not ever! _Jacob backed off and changed gears. "Your right, son... I'm so sorry. Really, I am," he apologized, slowly walking over to the work bench. "I was working on the old truck when suddenly my hands were shaking really bad, and then I couldn't bend my fingers around the wrench." Jacob ran his hands through his hair, tugging it to hide his frustration. _What had he done?_

"I got so pissed off I threw the wrench into the tool box over there and your Uncle Quil's smokes flew out. I know... it was a lame, but I thought I should give it try and see if it calmed my nerves, my hands... like it does for Quil." Jake sighed and leaned heavily against the work bench.

"What's wrong with the truck?" Jayden asked, taking the loving cue from his Dad to take things down a notch.

"Damn carburetor and I can't get the timing set correctly." Jake huffed and turned to the bench.

"Dad, I can set the time if you just tell me the correct setting, and gimme the wrench. I'll make  
>that damn carburetor wish It had cooperated with you..." Jayden smirked, grasping the wrench from his dad.<p>

Jacob smiled to himself. He got to teach his sons how to work on cars and stick up for what was right, no matter who or what they would have to fight.

And, ya know? He wouldn't have it any other way.

.

.

* * *

><p>*Giving more details would most likely go beyond the scope of this os. For more information check Wikipedia: http (:) /en (.) wikipedia (.) org/wiki/Becker%27s_muscular_dystrophy. The illness I'm talking about is a X-linked recessive inherited disorder and therefore shouldn't affect Jake's sons. His daughter, however, would be carrier of the disorder. BUT, this is fan fiction and I've decided I don't want the kids to a) be affected, b) be carriers.


	4. Part III II Heavy in your Arms

**Disclaimer:** **Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. If it belonged to me, the story would have gone different and Jacob end up with Bella.**

**First Beta: Jake's Girl**

**Second Beta: Jakejunkie  
><strong>

**A/N: This is the next installment of my short-story which was once thought as a one-shot. LOL Last time, I announced that I'd make it a five-shot. Today, I can tell you that I needed to split that part I'd been writing on once again, and I'm at six parts with this story by now. It seems this story has a life of its own. LOL Anyway, scenes are getting more detailed the more time I spend with this story and there are still so many ideas running through my head.**

**Thank you to my lovely betas, Jake's Girl and Jakejunkie. It means so much to me working with the two of you. Hugs.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Part III-II<strong>_

_**Heavy in your Arms**_

_**.  
><strong>_

oOo

.

Two years went by and Jacob slowly learned to accept his illness. He tried to see the positive things in his life, but the growing weakness in his legs was a constant reminder of what was lying ahead of him.

19 year old Jayden had graduated from high school and started Vo-Tech training at the Peninsula College to become a mechanic just like his father. In his off-time he tinkered on cars in his father's shop or spent his time out-doors, hanging out with friends or dating girls. He was different than Jeremy, in that he didn't focus on only one girl. He'd had several girlfriends since his last year of high school, but didn't find just one to really fall in love with.

However, this time it was on Jacob to find out about his son's _activities_.

He was alone in his house. Bella, Joey and Jacy where at Sue and Charlie's. He had made himself comfortable on the couch, chips and soda handy, watching TV when unexpectedly Jayden turned up. "Hey, I thought you had training tonight," Jacob asked, slightly annoyed. _There went his quiet evening... _

"Nah, got cancelled. Coach came down with the flu." Jayden went into his room (He'd moved into Jeremy's room recently as Jeremy was away at college), grabbing a handful of chips on his way there.

Two minutes later, the bathroom door clicked shut and the shower started.

Jacob returned to watching TV, until there was a small noise, the bathroom door clicked again and got locked. Then a hushed gasp came from the bathroom. "Watcha doin', son?" he yelled. "You know masturbating is bad for your health." Jacob snickered. "You might go blind or your nuts could shrivel..."

"Shut up, Dad!" Jayden shouted back from his shower and Jake focused on the TV again, grinning from the one ear to the other - _he simply loved to tease his kids_- then, he smelled an unfamiliar scent in his home.

_What the hell? _ he thought getting up and slowly walked through the hallway, trying to detect where that scent came from. It was a _girly_scent. Apple and cinnamon. Jacob frowned.

The smell intensified when he stopped in front of the bathroom door. "Gosh darnit!" he cursed quietly, when the girlish scent, combined with a frantic heartbeat, which was not his son's heartbeat, came from right behind that door.

"JAYDEN!" Jacob pounded against the door, and a girl responded with an hysterical squeal.

His son cursed, then shouted out a girl's name. "Fuck, Carlie!"

"Who are you screwing under my roof?" Jacob asked, laughing under his breath. He pounded another time; the door frame shook from his force and the girl screamed again. "Come on out here, right now, young lady."

A few seconds later, the door opened and out walked a small, blond girl. To Jacob's relief, she was completely dressed. She looked deeply embarrassed, but nevertheless also slightly smug.

"Care to explain what you're doing in my house?" Jacob started the interrogation, biting his lips to keep from laughing.

It turned out that Carlie, daughter of Jessica and Mike Newton, had been trying to peer at Jayden in the shower without Jayden knowing. She was supposed to wait outside and not follow him inside like a freaking stalker. In fact, Jayden felt pretty awkward that this girl had been able to sneak up on him and catch him in all his naked glory without him realizing it.

"I feel so... so... ARGH!" Jayden complained loudly and stomped away.

Jacob thought it hilarious, wishing Bella would have sneaked up on him like that once upon a time, but Bella smacked him upside the head, saying he was insensible and inconsiderate. Would he still think it funny if a boy snuck up like that on their teenage daughter?

He had to admit** that**would be totally different, but he still couldn't stop laughing his ass off.

For Bella, the incident was the last straw and she insisted Jacob would _once again_talk with his son about being responsible and always use protection when having sex. To Bella's surprise, Jayden openly told Jacob that he wasn't sleeping around with all the girls he dated. Apart from what happened, Carlie really was only a friend to him... like one of the boys...

"He only had sex with one girl as of yet," Jacob whispered into Bella's ear when they met in the office the next day.

"Really?" Bella stared at Jacob in disbelief.

"With all the trouble Joey is giving us that's good news about Jayden. I feel a_ bit_more competent. We must be doing something right..." Bella mused while she continued printing out bills.

Joey, turned 15 this year, and had gotten himself into a lot of trouble lately. He seemed to be constantly fighting with kids his age and older. No matter how much she or Jacob talked to him, his temper always got the best of him.

"Are you doubting your mad mothering skills again?" Jacob asked, putting his arms around her protectively. "Joey is a good boy. He's only a bit..."

"...temperamental and impulsive, I know." Bella cut in, leaning her head into his broad chest.

Only yesterday, Joey had to be picked up from school after getting into a fight with some older students. Joey swore to high heaven that he had not started the argument, but under no circumstances was he willing to let those kids get away with calling him the runt of the litter because of his small size.

"It can't be easy being the youngest son of the toughest, most important man on the Rez," Jacob crowed with a smile, while sorting through his work orders.

Bella elbowed him in the rips. "Braggart!"

He smiled back at her and ruffled her hair in a loving gesture. "Joey's just trying to find his way... not only in the mix at school, but within the family too." He squeezed her ass affectionately as she turned away.

"I know, but still..." Bella answered. Concern laced in her voice. She didn't like one of her kids having a rough time.

"What if I start working out with him a little?" Jacob mused, rubbing over his tingling leg. "I'm sure he'll like that..."

"What a wonderful idea," Bella said and pecked a kiss on Jake's lips before getting back to work on the stack of paper lying before her. She trusted him to find a way to make Joey feel strong from the inside. Just like he made her feel strong from the inside from the day they first met.

She looked up at him, tapping her pen against her lips. How did she end up having someone as amazing as her husband? Oh yeah, right... Because she had made the right choice over twenty years ago.

Bella stood up and wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her face into his chest. "I love you, Jake."

No matter how difficult life might be at times, they still wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

It happened on a Wednesday evening. Jacob had been grocery shopping and had picked up Jacy from Charlie and Sue's. Jacy sang along to a Disney tune, when suddenly a sharp pain shot through Jake's right leg. It twitched and his foot slipped from the brake onto the gas pedal. The car jerked forward, swerved about and after a few excruciating seconds it came to a screeching halt on the roadside bumping into a tree.

"FUCK!" Jacob shouted out and turned around. "Are you okay, Jacy?" he asked, in a panic. Before she could even answer, he unbuckled and climbed over his seat into the backseat, dragging his leg behind him. It didn't hurt anymore, but it was numb .

Jacy looked at him with huge, shocked eyes. "I'm scared."

With his enhanced senses, Jacob could hear her accelerated heartbeat and harsh breathing. "I'm sorry, hun," he said, running his hands over her arms and legs, searching for injuries. "Do you hurt?"

Jacy shook her head and sniffled, putting her little hand on her father's knee. "Is it your leg, daddy?"

"Yes, and I'm afraid I can't drive us home right now," he explained, feeling awful. He could have killed them both. There only needed to be another car involved, or if he had been driving a bit faster,...

He didn't dare to think further.

"I'm sorry, dad," Jacy replied, placing her hand against his cheek, and her deep-blue eyes bore into his. She looked and acted so much like Bella in this moment, Jacob was shaken. If something had happened to Jacy, he would never forgive himself.

Jacob and Jacy waited almost an hour for the numbness in his leg finally went away. When it didn't, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed Seth's number. If someone could be here fast, it would be Seth.

Bella was shocked when Jacob and Jacy walked in. Jacob was supported by Seth. "Jake, what happened? What took you so long?" she cried out and she jumped up from the book she was reading. She rushed to his side, trying to grab his arm. Jacob shook her off. "Leave me alone," he barked and limped into the bedroom, slamming the door closed behind him.

Bella learned through Jacy and Seth what had happened and she tried to talk with Jacob about it later but he wouldn't even hear her out. He was that angry with himself. "I could have killed her!" he seethed, pounding his numb leg with his balled up fist. "And don't tell me it isn't as bad as it seems." His anger now turned towards Bella.

"I'm sorry..." Bella said, lifting her hands placating him.

"You can be sorry all you want, Bella. It won't change a thing. I'm wasting away, and I'm taking my whole family with me." Jacob reached out and smashed his fist into the chair sitting next to his bed. It crashed into the wall; the impact brought the pictures down that were hung on that wall.

"Jake, please don't..." Bella wanted to sit down beside him. She wanted to calm him down. She was hurting when he talked like this. She hurt when he hurt.

"Get away from me, Bella. Just leave me alone!" Jacob yelled, vibrating with so much fury that the muscles in his neck and arms bunched. Suddenly, he kicked the night stand with his good leg, sending it sliding across the room. "Get out!"

Bella flew out of their bedroom, feeling as helpless as ever.

.

oOo

.

It didn't really surprise Bella that Jacob closed himself off again. It bothered her, of course, and it was hurting her, too. She wanted to be there for him, but he refused to even talk to her. She only wanted to help him feel better.

Maybe, hunkering down and hiding away to deal with his wounds, emotionally and physically, was a wolf thing.

She knew that Jacob would need to accept using a walking stick, and it would only be a matter of time until he would end up in a wheelchair. The rate at which his illness increased frightened her deeply.

Still, he wasn't open to discuss phasing. When she approached the subject the next morning - their kids were in school - he went through the roof.

"I promised to grow old with you, Bells," he thundered and limped out of the kitchen, propped on his cane. "But if I start phasing again I won't age... " The door to their bedroom slammed shut.

She ran after him, but the door was locked. "Jake..." Bella whispered, pressing her cheek against the bedroom door. "Don't do this to me... Not again..."

Jacob didn't answer, and Bella became angry. Without saying another word, she left and went for a walk at the beach. She sat down on their driftwood tree, it was so much more withered by now, and stared blankly at the ocean until it was time to pick up Jacy from the kindergarten.

Jacob didn't come out of the bedroom that day or the days after. He hid in the garage or busied himself at Alpha Auto.

Bella tried not to make a fuss about his behavior. She tried to be strong for him. What really bothered her though was that Jacy was suffering right along with her daddy.

Jacy was the only one Jacob allowed to be with him, the only one he accepted to comfort him.

That was a big job for a 5 year old girl.

.

oOo

.

Watching Bella struggle for a couple of days, Rachel finally decided to step in. She had had enough of her brother's moping and the way it wore Bella down.

The next night, Rachel dropped by Alpha Auto, steering straight towards Jacob, totally unimpressed by his rude, "Fuck off! I don't want to see you..."

"You can't hide forever," Rachel snapped back. "You have to accept what has been given to you."

"Leave me alone," Jacob grunted in warning, his hand clenching so tightly around the wrench he was holding, it contorted.

Embry discreetly hung up the "Closed" sign and left, ordering Jayden to come with him.

Neither Rachel nor Jacob recognized, they were too wrapped up in the looming fight.

Rachel approached him in a fury and stabbed him in the chest with her finger. "Dad never gave up. He never took it out on Mom or us."

"I'm not taking it out on Bella or the kids," Jacob growled. "Why do you think I'm out here all the time?"

Rachel laughed out sharply. "Do you hear yourself? Bella's a fucking mess because of you. You leave her hanging. She has to deal with everything. Alone!"

Jacob trembled with rage, and suddenly he threw the wrench across the garage. "I could have killed Jacy the other day because of my fucking condition," he seethed, punching his numb leg in disgust.

"But you didn't, Jake," Rachel answered sternly.

He snorted, pointed to his ruined car and shook his head, glaring at his sister.

"What do you want to do, huh?" Rachel yelled, fed up with her brother's stubbornness. "Hide away forever? You're not the only one having a hard time, Jacob! Mrs Jackson from across the street has been diagnosed with breast cancer, Tim Harper lost his job again, Connor Solomon was left by his wife. She took the kids with her. And I... I just had another miscarriage. Paul and I agreed to not ever try again," she said, swallowing the sob that stuck in her throat, ignoring the look of sympathy in Jake's eyes.

"Life just happens, Jake, and sometimes it sucks," she continued. "You just deal with it, Jake. You're the Chief. You can't leave everyone hanging. You don't even need your legs to do your job, so please... Do all of us a favor and pull your head out of your ass and start living again."

Jacob slumped down heavily on a pile of wheels, trying to drone out his sister's words, but no matter how hard he tried, he simply couldn't ignore it.

.

oOo

.

Over the next months, they slowly returned to their everyday life and family routine.

Whenever Bella thought it an opportune moment, she tried to talk Jacob into phasing, reasoning that maybe - if they were fortunate - he could put off the symptoms longer. "A try wouldn't hurt, Jake," she often pleaded, but he wouldn't give in.

Soon, it became a source of tension in their marriage, because as adamant as Jacob was on not-phasing Bella was equally stubborn on getting him phased. When talking didn't convince him, she started to pick fights and tried to anger him on purpose. She gave all she had to push him to phase - without success.

The constant fighting did not only put a strain on Jacob and Bella, it also was hard on the kids. Jayden was old enough to leave whenever the fighting started between his parents, while Jacy and Joey couldn't. Soon, Jayden began spending more time with his friends then he spent at home.

Joey, on the other hand, often went in between their arguments, getting even more frustrated when Jacob and Bella reduced their arguments to silent glares. He felt left out and as if his parents were keeping a secret from him. He couldn't know that he wasn't supposed to know about his father's ability to phase into a wolf. The whole situation didn't help with Joey's surly, temperamental attitude and explosive personality at all, and it didn't take long for Joey to completely refuse to cooperate with his parents and teachers, which caused even more fighting and accusations on his parents' side.

It was a vicious cycle as none of them were able to break out of the loop.

They needed help, but where could they go?

.

oOo

.

It was one of those days.

Once again, Bella had been in an argument with Jacob, and felt bad for the nasty things she'd said to him, to the man that she still loved so much. To her defense, Jacob had been his usual unapproachable self. The more she challenged him with her words, the more emotionally detached he became. It wasn't the Jacob she knew anymore. _Her _Jacob would have shouted back. He would have showed his anger or would have ended the fight, pulling her in a scorching kiss.

Bella eventually stopped her accusations and walked out of the room. It was like talking to the wall anyway. The stress and anxiety over his condition in addition to his cold demeanor seemed to bring out the worst in her. She was tired of all the arguing and fighting.

She sat down beside Jacy, who was watching Pocahontas in her room. Captured by her guilty conscience, she refused to look at Jake when he came after her. She also refused to answer him when he asked her to come and talk to him like civilized people. With a sigh, Jacob left the room after a while as he didn't want the fight to flare up again in front of their daughter.

Tears running down her face, she listened to him walking around the house and convincing a defiant Joey to finally go to bed. When everything got quiet in the house, Jacy sleeping for a long time already, she wondered if things would ever be alright again. If only the fighting would stop. She could deal with his health condition, if only they could go back to being their old caring, loving selves.

Bella fell asleep eventually with Jacy tucked into her side. Her sleep was fitful and disturbed by bad dreams, and she awoke with a start when she was picked up by strong arms. "Jake?" she mumbled groggily into his bare chest. "What are you doing?"

"I can't sleep without you, Bells." With a grunt, he tried to stay upright. His bad leg didn't make it easy for him to keep his balance.

"Let me down. You can't carry me anymore." Too tired to think, she wiggled in his hold, demanding to be let down. Her squirming made Jacob stumble.

"Shut up, honey, and hold on," he grumbled, helping her to wrap her arms and legs around him. "I can _still_carry you." Putting one arm under her bum, he gripped his cane with the other hand and walked them to their bedroom where he let her down on their bed.

"We can't do this to each other anymore," Jacob said, lowering himself beside her. He moved his arm around her, cradling her to his chest. "I want us back. What has become of Jake n Bells?" His voice cracked and Bella felt a painful sting in her heart at his words.

"I'm sorry, Jake... I don't want to bitch at you all the time." Bella started crying as all the bottled-up emotions and fears finally became too much. "If only you would stop shutting me out. If you at least would consider phasing, then..."

"Stop it, Bella," Jacob interrupted her with a stern voice. "I want you to just listen to me, will ya?"

Bella nodded, but nevertheless was afraid that their conversation would again only lead into another argument.

"I'm afraid," Jacob began, his hands tightening around her upper arms. "Afraid of phasing-"

"But why would you be afraid? You've been phasing for years..."

He pressed his finger to her lips to silence her. "Hear me out, Bella. Please!"

"Sorry," Bella whispered, and looked up into his eyes. She could see everything in his eyes, the depths of his love for her, the anger about their fucked-up situation, and the fear he'd been hiding from her so well for such a long time.

"I'm scared shitless. What if phasing makes it worse?" he wondered. "When I first phased, I thought I was going to die. The pain... The shifting of my bones... The heat racing through me... It was unbearable." His voice dropped to a husky whisper. "I was a lot younger back then and healthy as a horse. I last phased almost 8 years ago. I don't know how easily I could phase after all that time. I don't know if my body is strong enough to go through it again."

Jacob bit down on his lip as he peered into her eyes, pleading with her to understand. It wasn't easy for him to admit his fears to her, but he understood that he couldn't keep his concerns to himself anymore. In shutting himself off, he sort of was ignoring Bella's fears and that was hurting her. It also undermined the solid foundation of their marriage, and that was unacceptable.

"There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about just trying and see what happens, but then I think what would become of you if I ended up much worse... or dead..." He put his hands on both sides of her face, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs. "Bells, you have to understand... I'm not ignoring you... I know how afraid you are..."

"We could call Carlisle. I'm sure he'd could help..." Bella spoke up, lifting her hands to his face and touching it so tenderly.

"No, Bella." Jacob shook his head. "Not even WE know what phasing actually does to our bodies. He might be a doctor with over hundreds of years of experience and knowledge, but he isn't a shape shifter. I see no reason in consulting him yet again... Carlisle could only guess..."

"If you think so..." she answered reluctantly and a look of disappointment crossed her face.

"Ahhh, shit, Bells," he whispered, leaning his forehead against hers. "I'm sorry."

For a while, they stayed silent, listening to each other's' breaths, each dwelling on their own thoughts.

"Jake," Bella finally said and wrapped her arms around him. "I understand and I accept your apprehension. I think you're right. Nobody knows how phasing might turn out for you... So I... I will stop pestering you. But I'm scared too, Jake. I need you."

Jacob kissed her softly on her lips, his body melting into hers, willingly accepting her embrace. "I need you too, honey." He pressed his face between her breasts and inhaled deeply, drinking in her sweet, luscious scent. "I promise I'll talk to Seth and the others, asking for their opinions. I'll even consider giving Carlisle another try, if it makes you happy."

She entwined her hands in his long hair, and let out a shaky sob. "Jacob..."

"I won't stop fighting, Bells. I promise." He started to place soft, tender, light kisses on her throat, neck and face.

They still had a long way to go to get back to what they were, how they were, but they were determined to not give up. They knew that life wasn't only sunshine and roses. They couldn't change a lot of things, moreover they couldn't do a thing to improve his physical condition. However, they could change how they treated each other, and the first step was made. They started to be open to each other again, to compromise and to be willing to hear the other out.

They wouldn't have it any other way.

.

oOo

.

It was a couple of weeks into the summer. Jayden and Joey were off with their respective friends. Bella and Jacy had a picnic in the garden, watching Jacob and Seth wash Bella's SUV. Jacob's truck sat in the garage, untouched. He didn't sit once behind his steering wheel since the incident with Jacy, which was several months ago.

Jacy played with her new cat that recently joined the family, finally picking up the bundle of reddish fur and carrying it into the house. "Lucy needs some milk, Mom," Jacy announced and closed the door behind her.

Bella lay back on her forearms, barely paying attention to her daughter. Jacy was so independent and responsible for her young age; Bella had no problem leaving the little girl on her own for a couple of minutes.

Bella preferred to watch the show unfold in front of her. Was there anything better than two gorgeous men, stripped down to only their worn jeans, sweat and soapy water dripping from their russet skin?

Jacob found her staring when he walked around the side of his truck, propped on his cane. He smirked and with painstaking accuracy, he threw the soapy sponge he was holding in his hand. The sponge landed in her lap and she squealed like a teenage girl. "Jake!"

The sun broke through the car window, reflecting in the water, which sprayed from the garden hose Seth aimed at the truck. A rainbow appeared right over Jacob and as he reached out, his hand got engulfed in yellow and orange colors.

The phone rang inside the house. They both chose to ignore it, caught up in their little moment.

_He's so beautiful._Bella sighed.

_I love the way she looks at me,_Jacob thought. The phone stopped ringing, he heard Jacy answer and then his ears perked up as he heard Alice Cullen's frantic voice. "Where's your dad, honey? I know he's right there with you. Give me your dad."

Jacy appeared in the doorway, confused and sad that her _Auntie _Alice wouldn't talk to her.

"What's up, Jacy?" Jacob asked and limped over to his daughter, taking the phone from her outstretched hand.

Alice yelled through the phone at an impossible speed and pitch. "Your boys are going to jump off that cliff. You have to stop them... I don't know what's going to happen, but I can't see them anymore. Run before it's too late!"

Before Alice's words could register, his nose recognized the acrid scent of death and a wolf's howl sounded from the forest. His head swung round, his eyes locked with Seth's and there was only one thought that filled his mind, grabbing hold of the entire pack phased or un-phased: _Save the boys!_

The familiar burn raced through his body; a pain, sharp as a knife, cut through him; he heard Bella's frantic questions as she ran towards him, pulling Jacy back and then he exploded out of his skin, landing on all fours. Jacy screamed at the sight of him, but he had to ignore it. He had to run and save his sons.

.

oOo

.

Seth raced off as Jacob tried to catch up with him, but his hind legs really gave him trouble as he ran through the woods and towards the cliff. The loud voices in his head were overwhelming. Seeing the forest blur through the eyes of his pack made him dizzy. He wasn't used to all of this anymore Jacob realized with distaste and pushed himself harder to reach the cliff in time.

_I've got one, _Jacob heard Colin yell and the metallic screech of a vampire ripped apart, filled his ears.

_Fuck! Bloodsuckers on the Rez!_ Embry's voice suddenly was in his head. Paul's voice appeared a second later. His mind a whirlwind of angry energy. _Kill. Kill. Kill. _

_Two more!_Brady reported, showing all of them the ugly face of a crimson-eyed leech standing before him.

There was a persistent howling in the background. Jacob couldn't zero in on who it was, was one of the pack hurt? Had a vamp gotten one of them? _Who the hell is that howling?_ he demanded to know. _Who's down? Answer me damn it!_

No response!

Jacob pushed his body harder, faster, while trying to focus on all phased pack members to identify who was in pain.

_Colin, take him from behind!_Seth ordered, speeding around the last slope, and then a new and all too familiar voice popped up in Jacob's head.

_Shit! Shit! Shit! What's going on with me? Oh God, what's that fucking stench? _Then the confused yelling pitched up another notch. _What the fuck? Why am I standing on four legs?_

_Holy shit! JAYDEN? _Jacob stiffened, and then stumbled mid run, trying to reel in his shock as he realized what just had happened. _Calm down, Jay. I'm coming! _Jacob barked as Jayden took off with high speed, running as if the devil was right behind him.

_Ohmygodohmygodohmygod. I hear voices in my head. Joey! Where are you? H E L P meeeee, somebody!" _Through the pack mind, Jacob felt Jayden's body burn and throb with pain from the sudden, forceful transformation. He felt his son's mind swirl out of control and could see him running in circles, totally confused and disoriented.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh! DA... DA... DAD!" Jacob heard his youngest son scream and then he watched Joey transform through the horrified eyes of Jayden.

_Oh God, no! Not Joey, too!_Jacob choked.

_Joey?_Jayden squinted and tried to focus on the mahogany colored fur ball in front of him.

_J A Y? _The small wolf choked out tentatively.

_They're too close! _Seth yelled, shooting the vision of the boys near the edge of the cliff, another vamp creeping closer, Jayden chasing his tail and what HAD to be Joey writhing on his back near the edge. With a mighty roar, Paul jumped at the vampire, ripping its head clear from its shoulders.

Jayden froze instantly, snapping out of his panic, but snarling and growling menacingly at the huge grey wolf in front of him. Standing protectively before his brother, he crouched low, ready to attack anything that dared to come closer. How should he be able to know friend from foe in his confused state of mind?

_Paul, back off. You're scaring the boys. Take that leech and burn it! Boys! S T OP ! _Jake yelled._ Its ME, Dad! I'm coming for you guys... Hold on!_

_Dad? _Joey jumped to his four feet, almost slithering over the edge.

Seth came upon them like a freight train and skidded to a halt spitting up dirt, leaves and pine cones at them. He grabbed Joey by the scruff of his neck, pulling him back up on the cliff.

_Holy Shit!_Jayden shrieked at the sight of Seth and then out of pure instinct, he attacked.

_Sit the fuck down! Both of you! _Jacob roared in his sternest alpha voice and both boys fell to their hind haunches like they had lead anvils in their butts.

_It's alright guys,_ Seth said in a soothing voice as he stepped forward. _Your dad will be here in a second._

_Uncle Seth? _The new cubs gaped in awe and disbelief at the huge wolf in front of them.

Just then Jacob bound over a rock landing on all fours a foot from his boys, _errrr, cubs.._. causing another round of terrified screeches to erupt from them.

_That's your dad, guys. _Seth snorted with a huge wolfy grin, then let his tongue loll out as if he chuckled.

Jacob stood before his two sons, stunned by the transformation of not only Jayden, but his Joey too. He assessed the boys' thoughts for a moment before he spoke. _Are you okay? Anyone hurt? _When both of them confirmed they weren't hurt, Jacob sank to the ground, exhausted and overwhelmed. How would Bella take the news? What would they tell Jeremy?

_I can't move my butt..._Joey eventually complained.

_Alpha order..._ Seth offered with a smirk and nudged Jacob. _You okay, man?_

_Alpha what?_ Jayden responded still totally confused, trying to wiggle his butt - to no avail. He growled agitated. _What the fuck is going on here? _

_We're WOLVES, Dad? Seriously...what the fuck? _Joey tried to move, sitting still had never been his strong suit. _ How are... Why are..._

_Does mom know about this?_Jayden asked, trying to make sense of everything going on.

_We got the stinking leeches! Jake, where the hell are you?_ Embry called out.

_Got four of those sparkly ass muther fuckers, Jake! _Paul growled loudly.

_Can you freaking believe that shit?_ Colin chimed in.

The battle wearied wolves played the attack over in their minds to the shock and terror of the new  
>wolves.<p>

_We can read each other's minds?_ Jayden groaned and fell to the ground, his huge paws covering his head.

_I have to puke. Can wolves puke, dad? _Joey felt sick to the bones.

_Why do I feel Jayden and Joey, Jake?_ Embry growled, deep concern flooding the phased pack as a whole.

_Silence..._

_Uncle Em_? Jayden questioned softly, lifting his head from under his paws, his utter disbelief mounting.

_Em, tell Bells we're okay. We'll come home as soon as we can, _Jacob said and ordered all other wolves to phase back and go home. He would stay behind and help his sons to phase back human.

Two out of Jacob's three sons now were members of the wolf pack and were warmly welcomed by them. Jayden had the same russet coat like his father, while Joey - a lot smaller than his brother - was mahogany colored.

.

oOo

.

Much later, Jacob finally returned home, a worn-out Jayden on his two human feet and a still phased, aggravated Joey at his side. Jacob was exhausted; his body felt as if it were on fire; he could barely stay upright anymore.

Bella was on the edge of a nervous break-down when she took in the changed sight of Jayden. He'd grown to his father's height and packed on a lot of muscles. The last remnants of his boyish features were gone. And then there was this mahogany wolf, walking by Jake's side, who looked at her through Joey's eyes.

Her eyes flitted back and forth between her boys and Jacob. The situation reminded her so much of the moment when she saw Jacob for the first time after the transformation, when she took in his hardened, angular features and the bulging muscles.

All this time they had tried to protect their boys and now it had happened anyway. Her knees buckled. The only thing that kept her from passing out was Jacob's alarmed, worried glance.

Jacy hid in the farthest corner of their kitchen, watching her brother and father through curious eyes. She still was confused, but since Bella had explained everything to her earlier, she had calmed down a lot. But where was her other brother? Why did that large mahogany wolf have Joey's eyes? Slowly, she began to comprehend everything.

When Joey lay down in the middle of the hallway with a huff, Jacy slowly inched closer until she could touch his coat. "Joey?"

He huffed again and nudged her softly. She was so tiny against his massive body.

Jacy giggled, then her tentative hands stroked through his fur soothingly, and after a while his form suddenly blurred and he phased back.

He stayed there, too exhausted to move one single inch of his sore body. Jacy pulled a blanket over him and made her mommy cook cocoa for all of them.

Searching for some normalcy in this emotional turmoil, they all huddled together with their cocoa cups and large bowls of fresh popcorn, while Jayden and Joey repeated the events over and over again, trying to process everything, until one after the other passed out and fell asleep.

Bella and Jacob, being the last one awake, both quietly agreed that this was not what they had wished for their sons, but the most important thing was that they survived the vampire attack.

They were sure, their boys would be able to deal with their shape shifter heritage.

Jacob closed his eyes and wrapped his arm around his Bella. With a sigh he murmured, "_Still_ wouldn't want it any other way..."

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oOo

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End file.
